Part 11

“You already are.”
The answer broke something in her expression.
Jamie saw it and looked away.
Adrian’s voice was unsteady. “Did he tell you where he found you?”
“No.”
“Did you ever ask?”
“Yes.”
“What did he say?”
“That my mother left.”
Lydia made a sound too small to be called a gasp.
Jamie’s anger disappeared beneath alarm.
Nora placed one hand firmly against Lydia’s back.
Adrian turned toward his mother. “She didn’t.”
Jamie looked between them.
“She didn’t,” Adrian repeated. “Whatever happened, she didn’t leave.”
Lydia could not speak.
Adrian faced Jamie fully. “I’ve been angry with her for a lot of things. Some of them she deserved. But not that. She never stopped looking.”
“Adrian,” Lydia whispered.
He ignored her.
“She ruined her marriage over it. She spent money she didn’t have then. She kept boxes of records in our house and paid people to follow bad leads because she couldn’t stop. She built that foundation because she needed every ambulance in New England to work perfectly since one didn’t for him.”
Jamie’s face tightened. “You don’t know what James was told.”
“No. I don’t.”
“You don’t know what happened.”
“No.”
“Then stop making him a criminal.”
“I didn’t.”
“You’re thinking it.”
Adrian glanced at Lydia. “We’re all thinking everything.”
That answer reached Jamie.
He looked at Adrian for a long time.
The two photographers had been pushed farther back by station security, but cameras continued to rise above shoulders. The scene had acquired witnesses who understood nothing except resemblance.
Nora leaned close to Lydia. “We cannot stay exposed.”
Lydia nodded, though she did not move.
Jamie slid the stained card into his coat pocket, separate from the watch.
“You said you wouldn’t follow me.”
“I won’t.”
“You said you wouldn’t search James.”
Lydia hesitated.
Jamie saw it.
“You didn’t say that,” he corrected.
“No.”
“Will you?”
The truthful answer was yes. Every instinct she possessed demanded it. James Vale had a work history, an address trail, records, colleagues, perhaps a grave. Lydia’s resources could reconstruct him by morning.
But Jamie had given the name in a moment of pressure, not consent.
“No,” she said.
Nora looked at her.
Lydia held Jamie’s gaze. “Not without your permission.”
“What if I never give it?”
The question seemed to stop the rain.
Lydia’s lips pressed together. “Then I will live with that.”
Adrian turned toward her, shocked.
Jamie watched him. “You don’t agree.”
“No,” Adrian said.
“Adrian,” Lydia warned.
“He asked.”
Jamie waited.
Adrian’s hands had begun to tremble. He put them in his coat pockets.
“I don’t agree,” he said. “I don’t know how I’m supposed to walk away from this and pretend I can wait forever.”
“I didn’t ask you to pretend.”
“You might leave and never call.”
“Yes.”
“And I’m supposed to accept that?”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
“Because it’s my life.”
“It might be mine too.”
Jamie’s face shifted.
Adrian swallowed. “That’s selfish. I know. You didn’t come here asking for a brother. You didn’t ask for us. But I grew up with an empty place next to me that everyone said I wasn’t allowed to fill. I don’t know how to see you and then go back to not knowing.”
Jamie looked toward the terminal clock.
For several seconds, he seemed unable to answer.
Then he said, “I grew up with one chair at the table.”
Adrian’s expression softened.
“James worked nights,” Jamie continued. “I ate dinner alone most of the time. On birthdays he bought two cupcakes because they came in pairs at the grocery store. He always said the second was for tomorrow.”
The watch chain slipped from his pocket as his hand moved. He caught it.
“After he died, I found receipts,” he said. “Two cupcakes every February seventeenth. Even when I was a baby. Even before I could eat them.”
Lydia pressed her fingers against her mouth.
Jamie’s voice roughened. “Maybe he knew. Maybe he thought I had someone somewhere. Maybe he bought one for a child he took me from. Or maybe he was just a tired man buying the cheap package. I don’t know.”
Adrian’s eyes filled, though no tears fell.
“I hate cupcakes,” he said.
Jamie stared at him.
Adrian gave a breath that almost became a laugh. “I’ve always hated them.”
Something fragile moved through Jamie’s face.
“Then he picked wrong,” he said.
“Maybe the other one was yours.”
The reply came before Adrian could protect himself from it.
Jamie looked down.
Lydia watched both of them standing beneath the station clock, nearly identical and utterly unknown to each other. The distance between them was only a few feet. It contained twenty-five years.
A station official approached Nora from behind and whispered in her ear. Nora listened, then nodded.
“We have a private passage available,” she said. “Not the hotel. It leads to a staff exit on the north side. Jamie can leave without the cameras seeing which direction he takes.”
Jamie looked at her. “And them?”
“We stay here.”
Adrian objected. “No.”
Nora turned toward him. “This is not your decision.”
“He’ll disappear.”
Jamie’s jaw tightened at the word again.
Nora faced him. “You may leave. No one from the station, hotel, or family will follow. I will remain with Lydia and Adrian. You have Lydia’s number.”
Jamie touched the pocket containing the card.
Nora continued. “I am not asking you to trust us. I am giving you the cleanest exit I can.”
He looked toward the passage.
The crowd had grown. Someone across the street called the hotel’s name. Another voice asked whether Lydia had found her missing son. The question traveled through strangers, gaining certainty each time it was repeated.
Jamie flinched.
Lydia stepped forward before remembering not to.
He saw the movement.
She stopped.
The distance remained.
“I am sorry,” she said.
“For what?”
“For today.”
“You didn’t plan it.”
“No.”
“Then why apologize?”
“Because my life is swallowing yours in public.”
Jamie looked at the cameras.
May you like
“That happens to people around you?”
“More than it should.”