Chương 13
“I don’t know.”
“Estimate.”
“Two.”
“Did she ever give Lily anything herself?”
Natalie swallowed.
“Once.”
Mark’s head snapped toward her.
“What?”
“It was children’s allergy medicine.”
“When?”
“I don’t remember.”
“What did Melissa give my daughter?”
“She said it was Benadryl.”
“Why?”
“Lily wouldn’t sleep.”
“At our house?”
“Yes.”
“You were there?”
“No.”
Mark went utterly still.
Shaw asked the next question.
“Where were you?”
“At Dean’s game.”
“And Melissa was babysitting?”
“Yes.”
Mark pressed both hands to the back of his neck.
Shaw asked, “Did you instruct Melissa to medicate Lily?”
Natalie’s answer came too softly.
“Yes.”
I watched Mark close his eyes.
For a second, I thought he might fall.
He did not.
He simply stood there while another piece of his daughter’s life became something he had never known.
Shaw turned away to make another call.
Natalie looked at Mark.
“I’m sorry.”
He opened his eyes.
She tried again.
“I know that doesn’t fix anything.”
“No.”
“I love Lily.”
Mark looked at her for a long time.
“I believe you.”
Natalie blinked.
The answer surprised all of us.
Then Mark continued.
“That’s the worst part.”
Her face folded.
“You loved her and still made her unsafe.”
Natalie covered her mouth.
Mark’s voice stayed quiet.
“I kept trying to understand how somebody could do this if they loved their kid.”
He looked toward the upstairs windows of his house.
“I think I understand now.”
Natalie lowered her hand.
He shook his head.
“Love didn’t stop you.”
She cried without making a sound.
“It just gave you something else to lie to yourself about.”
Shaw returned.
“Mr. Whitaker, we’re going to need you to leave the property for tonight.”
Mark looked at the house.
“What about her?”
“Mrs. Whitaker is being asked to come with us for further questioning.”
Natalie’s face changed.
“Am I under arrest?”
“Not at this moment.”
“Can I get clothes?”
“We’ll arrange that.”
Mark looked at Shaw.
“What about Melissa?”
“Officers are going to speak with her.”
“And Dean?”
“We’re working on identifying him.”
Mark laughed bitterly.
“Working on it.”
Shaw held his gaze.
“I know that’s not satisfying.”
“No.”
“It’s also the truth.”
Mark put his hands in his pockets.
“What do I tell Lily tomorrow?”
Shaw’s expression softened slightly.
“That part I can’t answer for you.”
We drove back to my house without speaking.
Mark stared out the passenger window until we reached my street.
Then he said, “I believed everything.”
I kept my eyes on the road.
“What do you mean?”
“Every excuse.”
He counted them without looking at me.
“She was tired.”
“She needed space.”
“Money was tight.”
“Lily had trouble sleeping.”
“I should take another shift.”
His voice grew quieter.
“Every single thing made sense by itself.”
“That’s why you believed it.”
“No.”
He shook his head.
“I believed it because believing it was easier.”
I parked in the driveway.
The house was dark except for the hallway lamp.
Mark did not move.
“Dad.”
“Yeah?”
“If Lily hadn’t told you, how long would this have kept going?”
I looked at the front door.
Through that door was an eight-year-old asleep beside a broken sewing machine, wearing mismatched socks and a hospital bracelet.
“I don’t know.”
Mark nodded.
For once, neither of us asked for a better answer.
At six the next morning, I woke to the smell of coffee and found Mark standing barefoot in my kitchen, still wearing yesterday’s clothes.
He had not slept.
He had made coffee strong enough to peel paint and left the spoon in the sugar bowl.
“You’re ruining my kitchen.”
He looked at the spoon.
“Sorry.”
“You’re supposed to deny it first.”
“I’m tired.”
He poured another cup.
That was when I noticed his wedding ring on the table beside his phone.
He had brought it home in his pocket and set it there sometime during the night.
Neither of us mentioned it.
Lily appeared twenty minutes later with her hair flattened on one side and the hospital bracelet still around her wrist.
“Do I have school?”
Mark looked at me.
I looked at him.
“No,” he said.
She brightened immediately.
“Because I’m sick?”
“Because we’re taking a day.”
“Can we get pancakes?”
Mark’s face almost broke.
“Yeah.”
“Chocolate chip?”
“Yeah.”
“With whipped cream?”
“Don’t push it.”
She smiled.
For the first time since Tuesday afternoon, she looked eight.
We went to the diner near my house because Lily liked the paper placemats and because neither Mark nor I could think of anything better to do with the hour before the detective called.
She ordered chocolate-chip pancakes and negotiated whipped cream anyway.
Mark ordered eggs and did not eat them.
I ordered oatmeal, which Lily described as “sad breakfast.”
The waitress laughed.
“Kid’s got a point.”
For ten minutes, the world behaved normally.
Silverware clinked.
A truck driver complained about road construction.
Two retirees argued quietly about a football game.
Lily drew a cat on the back of the placemat and gave it six legs because, according to her, four was boring.
Then Mark’s phone rang.
He looked at the screen.
Detective Shaw.
Mark stepped outside.
I watched him through the window while Lily tried to stack sugar packets into a tower.
His shoulders went rigid.
Then dropped.
Then rigid again.
When he returned, he sat without touching his food.
“What?”
I asked.
“They found Melissa.”
“And?”
“She admitted giving Lily Benadryl once.”
Lily was concentrating on her sugar tower.
Mark lowered his voice.
“She says Natalie told her Lily had a doctor’s okay for it.”
I looked at him.
“Did she believe that?”
“She says she did.”
“Do they?”
“I don’t know.”
He rubbed his forehead.
“Melissa also gave them Dean’s last name.”
“That helps.”
“Maybe.”
I let the word pass.
Mark stared at his plate.
“Shaw says Natalie’s cooperating.”
“That matters too.”
He looked at me.
“Don’t.”
“I didn’t say it excuses anything.”
“She keeps giving them pieces only after they find another piece.”
“That sounds like Natalie.”
May you like
It did.
Even before any of this, Natalie had hated being cornered.
