Chương 6
Their faces were not relaxed.
Judge Lawson resumed the bench.
Everyone stood.
Everyone sat.
The clerk called the matter again as if the last fifteen minutes had never happened.
Judge Lawson looked at Hale.
“I want to know why transport arrived before a placement order existed.”
Hale spoke quietly with Delaney, then faced the bench.
“Your Honor, preliminary information suggests the transport request was entered yesterday in anticipation of today's hearing.”
“In anticipation of an order?”
“Yes.”
“By whom?”
“We are determining that.”
Judge Lawson took off his glasses.
“I suggest determining it quickly.”
Delaney stood.
“Your Honor, if I may, the placement coordination unit often schedules transports conditionally because same-day availability is difficult.”
“Was the request marked conditional?”
“I don't know.”
“Was Mr. Mack informed it was conditional?”
“I don't know.”
“Was anyone assigned to tell these children that a stranger might arrive with an infant carrier before this court had ruled?”
Delaney's jaw tightened.
“No.”
Judge Lawson put his glasses back on.
“Then whether the process was routine is not particularly comforting.”
Hale did not argue.
I found myself feeling unexpectedly sorry for Delaney.
She had spent the morning defending a system she clearly did not control.
That did not make the consequences smaller.
It merely made the villain less convenient.
Judge Lawson turned to me.
“You witnessed what just occurred.”
“Yes, sir.”
“Did it change your position?”
The question surprised me.
I looked at Rachel.
She gave no signal.
“Yes.”
Hale raised his eyebrows.
Judge Lawson said, “How?”
“I thought keeping them together was the main problem.”
“And now?”
“Keeping them together won't fix what happened to them.”
The courtroom became quiet again.
I hated how often silence arrived after I spoke.
It made every sentence feel like testimony even when I was trying not to perform.
“Leo didn't trust me when I told him Ellie wasn't being taken.”
“He shouldn't have.”
Hale looked over.
I continued.
“Everybody keeps saying he's traumatized like that means some part of his reaction isn't reasonable.”
“He has been moved.”
“His parents disappeared.”
“Adults make plans around him.”
“People tell him maybe.”
“Then a guy shows up with a carrier.”
I rubbed both hands down my thighs.
“If they come home with me, he's still going to be waiting for the next car.”
Judge Lawson nodded slightly.
“What does that mean for your request?”
“It means I need more help than I thought.”
Rachel's head turned.
So did Delaney's.
I could feel some invisible advantage leaking out of my case.
Oddly, I felt better.
“And if the court's conditions reveal that you cannot provide that help?”
The answer hurt before I said it.
“Then they shouldn't stay with me.”
Rachel's pen stopped.
Hale watched me carefully.
Judge Lawson said, “Even if that means separation?”
I looked toward the side door.
For a second I saw Leo's fingertips still caught in Ellie's shirt.
“I'd fight the separation.”
“That is not what I asked.”
“I know.”
My mouth had gone dry.
“If keeping them together with me makes them less safe, then I can't pretend together is automatically better.”
The words tasted like betrayal.
They also felt necessary.
Judge Lawson sat back.
“There is a difference between being willing to sacrifice for children and being willing to make children part of your sacrifice.”
Nobody moved.
I understood exactly what he meant.
I had emptied my savings, altered my business, rebuilt my workshop, and told myself those things proved seriousness.
But suffering was not qualification.
Ruining my own life would not feed Ellie at three in the morning.
It would not make Leo sleep.
It would not keep June from running into traffic if I was distracted with Ben.
Judge Lawson looked toward Delaney.
“I am ordering the department to conduct an immediate support conference.”
“Today.”
“Before anyone leaves this courthouse with these children.”
Delaney nodded and started writing.
“The provisional placement will be considered only if concrete safeguards are confirmed.”
He began counting them without ceremony.
“Overnight backup.”
“Daily department contact for the first seven days.”
“An in-home visit within twenty-four hours.”
“Pediatric appointments initiated within seventy-two hours.”
“Trauma-services intake scheduled.”
“School stability reviewed before any transfer.”
He looked at me.
“And you will not operate power equipment while you are the sole supervising adult in the residence.”
I blinked.
“My workshop is detached.”
“That wasn't my condition.”
“Yes, sir.”
Hale stood.
“Your Honor, the department would request authority for unannounced visits.”
“Granted.”
Rachel rose.
“We would ask that any removal absent immediate safety concerns require court review.”
Hale objected.
“What constitutes immediate safety concerns can develop quickly.”
Rachel turned toward him.
“And unilateral disruption is exactly what triggered the incident in the hallway.”
Delaney spoke before either lawyer could continue.
“Could the department notify counsel immediately if removal is being considered, unless emergency circumstances prevent it?”
Rachel looked at me.
I nodded.
“That is acceptable.”
Judge Lawson wrote for several seconds.
Then he looked up.
“This is not approval.”
My stomach sank anyway.
“This is a path toward approval.”
The distinction restored air to the room.
“Court will reconvene at four o'clock.”
He struck the gavel once, lightly.
“Until then, the children remain together under department supervision.”
The sound had barely faded when Rachel grabbed my sleeve.
“We have five hours.”
“Four and a half.”
“Don't correct me when I'm trying to save your family.”
The word family stopped both of us.
Rachel noticed it first.
She looked away and began stuffing files into her case.
“Come on.”
We found Delaney in a small conference room with a round table, eight mismatched chairs, and a coffeemaker that looked older than me.
She was already on the phone.
“No, I need enhanced services authorization today.”
She listened.
“No.”
Another pause.
“No, Marianne, the judge did not ask whether the unit is fully staffed.”
She closed her eyes.
“Yes, I understand that's inconvenient.”
She looked directly at me.
“So are five children.”
Rachel sat beside me.
May you like
I whispered, “I think I like her.”
“Don't.”
