Chương 9
Priya stayed for dinner. She spoke to Noah about dinosaurs and did not ask him to like her. When he refused to sit beside her, she chose a chair at the other end of the table. When he dropped a pea into her water, she removed it with a spoon and continued eating.
Adrian watched the interaction while cutting chicken into pieces Noah had not requested.
Elena served the meal, then joined Beatrice in the pantry. She had never eaten with the family while in uniform. Adrian almost invited her to sit, then understood that doing so in the middle of a conflict about boundaries would make the invitation another demand disguised as warmth.
After dinner, Priya reviewed the upstairs routine. Elena showed her where Noah’s extra blankets were kept, which night-light he preferred, and how he asked for water when he wanted reassurance rather than water. She said it all in a practical voice.
Noah followed them from room to room.
At bedtime, he climbed into bed and pointed at the chair.
“Elena sits there.”
Priya sat on the rug instead. “I sit here.”
“You’re doing it wrong.”
“Probably. It’s my first night in your house.”
“I don’t like you.”
“That’s allowed.”
“You should leave.”
“That decision belongs to your father.”
Noah looked toward Adrian. “Make her.”
Adrian stood in the doorway, occupying the same place where the previous morning had begun.
“She’s staying until morning.”
Noah kicked the blanket. “Then you leave.”
“I’m staying too.”
“No.”
“I’ll sit in the hall.”
“No.”
“Then in my room with the door open.”
“No!”
The shout startled all of them. Noah grabbed the red scarf and pressed it over his face.
Elena took one step forward and stopped.
Adrian felt the entire household waiting for him to fail in a familiar way.
He sat on the floor outside Noah’s room. “I’ll be here.”
“I don’t want you.”
“I know.”
“Get Elena.”
“No.”
The scarf trembled over the boy’s face.
Adrian lowered his voice. “She is downstairs. She has finished work.”
“She loves me.”
“Yes.”
“Then she’ll come.”
“People can love you and still need rest.”
“Mommy rested forever.”
Priya looked down.
Elena’s hand rose to her mouth.
Adrian remained seated. “Your mother died. Elena is going home. Those are not the same.”
“They both leave.”
“I leave too.”
“You do.”
The admission made Noah lower the scarf.
“I have left too much,” Adrian said. “I’m here tonight.”
“You’ll get tired.”
“Yes.”
“You’ll get mad.”
“Maybe.”
“You’ll yell.”
“I will try not to.”
“That means maybe.”
“Yes.”
Noah watched him for a long time. “Sit where I can see your shoes.”
Adrian moved closer to the doorway until the polished toes of his black shoes were visible from the bed.
Priya remained on the rug. Elena walked downstairs.
Noah fell asleep at ten-forty.
At eleven, Adrian found Elena in the laundry room pressing Noah’s school shirt. The machine hummed beside her. A basket of folded towels sat on the floor.
“You’re off the clock,” he said.
“I wanted to finish.”
“Beatrice told me the pressing can wait.”
Elena lifted the iron and set it upright. “Then it can wait.”
“Priya seems competent.”
“She is.”
“Noah dislikes her.”
“He disliked me for two months.”
“What changed?”
“I stopped trying to make him like me.”
Adrian leaned against the doorframe. “Did Claire speak to you about him?”
“Sometimes.”
“About me?”
Elena unplugged the iron.
“That is not an answer.”
“She was my employer.”
“She is dead.”
“That does not make every private conversation yours.”
He looked at the steam thinning above the board. “Did she think I was a bad father?”
Elena folded the shirt along the sleeves. “She thought you were afraid of being an ordinary one.”
“What does that mean?”
“She said you approached bedtime like a negotiation. You wanted the correct method, the correct result, the minimum number of variables.”
Despite himself, Adrian smiled. “That sounds like her.”
“She also said you crawled under Noah’s crib one night because he dropped a blue sock and would not sleep without it.”
“I was trapped for twenty minutes.”
“She mentioned that.”
“What else?”
Elena’s expression warned him, but he waited.
“She said you loved him most when no one was watching.”
The words did not comfort him.
“That is not enough,” he said.
“No.”
“Why didn’t she tell me?”
“Maybe she did.”
He looked at her.
Elena placed the folded shirt into the basket. “People say many things to the person they live with. Not all of them are heard.”
“You make a habit of telling me unpleasant truths.”
“You ask unpleasant questions.”
“Do you dislike me?”
She considered it with more seriousness than he expected. “Sometimes.”
“Only sometimes?”
“I do not know you well enough for consistency.”
He laughed once. She did not.
“I was unfair yesterday,” he said. “In the study. With Margaret.”
“Yes.”
“And in offering to pay for school.”
“Yes.”
“I don’t know how to repair either.”
“Do not repeat them.”
“That seems insufficient.”
“Repair is usually repetitive.”
The washing machine changed cycles. Water rushed through a pipe in the wall.
“Margaret may try to establish that I’ve neglected him,” Adrian said.
Elena rested both hands on the laundry basket. “Have you?”
He felt irritation, then exhaustion. “Yes.”
The answer sat between them without spectacle.
“Not physically,” he continued. “He has had everything.”
“That is not what you meant.”
“No.”
Elena looked down at the white cuffs of her uniform. “My interview is Monday.”
“I won’t interfere.”
“I did not think you would.”
“I considered calling the school.”
She looked up sharply.
“To provide a recommendation.”
“I have not asked for one.”
“Then I won’t.”
“Thank you.”
He stepped aside as she lifted the basket.
“Elena.”
She paused.
“I am not asking you to stay.”
“Good.”
“I am asking whether we can tell Noah together.”
Her face tightened. “Tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow,” he agreed.
May you like
They told him after breakfast.
Noah listened from beneath the dining table. Elena sat on one side, Adrian on the other, both of them visible from the knees down.
