Part 12
“You used to say that about my pancakes.”
“I don’t remember your pancakes.”
“They were bad.”
“Dad burns toast.”
“I heard.”
Graham looked toward Dr. Levin.
She pretended to study the timer.
Nora repaired the ear while Theo watched. She made three small stitches, paused, removed one, and began again.
“Why did you take medicine?” Theo asked.
The needle stopped.
“My back hurt at first,” Nora said. “Then I used it when other things hurt too.”
“What things?”
“Being scared. Feeling like I was failing.”
“Did it help?”
“For a little while. Then it made everything worse.”
“Do you still take it?”
“No.”
“Ever?”
“No.”
“What if your back hurts?”
“I take different medicine that my doctor knows about. Or I use heat. Sometimes I complain.”
“To who?”
“A woman named Linda. She owns the house where I live.”
“Is she your mom?”
“No.”
“Do you have another kid?”
Nora’s face tightened.
“No.”
“Why not?”
“I didn’t want another child while I wasn’t allowed to see you.”
Graham watched Theo receive the answer. It mattered to him, though he did not show how.
Nora finished the stitches and held out the rabbit.
Theo inspected the seam.
“It’s crooked.”
“It was crooked before.”
“No, it wasn’t.”
“It definitely was.”
He ran his finger over the thread.
“Can you fix the other ear too?”
“It isn’t broken.”
“It might break.”
Nora glanced at Dr. Levin.
The therapist gave no direction.
“I can add a stitch,” Nora said.
Theo moved to the chair beside her.
The meeting lasted forty-three minutes.
When they left, Theo did not hug Nora. At the elevator, he turned back.
“Are you going home now?”
“To the hotel first. Then Vermont tomorrow.”
“Can we eat dinner?”
Graham looked at Dr. Levin.
She said, “A short dinner in a public place could be manageable if everyone agrees on an ending time.”
Nora’s eyes moved to Graham.
He felt the old resistance rise. The plan had been twenty minutes. Extending it introduced risk. Theo was tired. Nora was emotional. Graham wanted procedures because procedures promised that harm would become predictable.
Then he looked at his son holding the repaired rabbit.
“One hour,” he said.
They ate at a diner.
Theo ordered pancakes at four in the afternoon because Nora had said hers were bad. He poured too much syrup over them and became nauseated after three bites. Nora asked too many questions at first—school, soccer, books, friends—and Theo retreated into one-word answers.
Graham interrupted by asking Nora whether she still hated mustard.
“I never hated mustard,” she said.
“You called it yellow punishment.”
“That was your mother’s mustard. It came in a crystal bowl.”
Theo laughed with his mouth full.
The conversation loosened.
Nora told him about the ninety-one-year-old patient who refused a walker. Theo described a classmate who ate glue in first grade and denied it while his lips were purple. Graham corrected him: the glue had been blue.
“That’s not important,” Theo said.
“It was extremely blue.”
Nora watched them with an expression Graham could not name.
At the end of the hour, Theo became quiet.
Outside the diner, Nora crouched so they were nearly eye level.
“Thank you for seeing me.”
“Are you coming next Saturday?”
“If Dr. Levin and your dad think it’s okay.”
Theo frowned.
“What do you think?”
“I want to.”
“Then say that.”
“I want to come next Saturday.”
He nodded.
Nora stood.
For one moment, it seemed Theo might hug her. Instead, he lifted the rabbit.
“The ear is still crooked.”
“I’ll bring better scissors.”
She walked toward her hotel.
Theo watched until she entered the lobby.
In the car, he asked, “Did she look sick?”
“Not the way she did before.”
“Could she get sick again?”
“Yes.”
“Would she leave?”
“I don’t know.”
Theo leaned his head against the window.
“I hate ‘I don’t know.’”
“So do I.”
The next morning, Eleanor called.
Graham had ignored six previous messages. This time he answered because Theo was outside with the property manager, examining animal tracks near the greenhouse.
“How did it go?” Eleanor asked.
“How did what go?”
“Do not insult me.”
“Who told you?”
“No one needed to.”
“You knew Nora was coming.”
“I knew you would move quickly.”
“We met at Dr. Levin’s office.”
“And?”
“And it is not your concern right now.”
“Theodore is always my concern.”
“You lost the right to information when you used information to control him.”
Eleanor went quiet.
“I would like to speak to him.”
“No.”
“You cannot prevent him from speaking to me indefinitely.”
“I’m not. I’m giving him space.”
“Did he ask for space?”
“He asks whether you are angry at him.”
The silence changed.
“Why would he think that?”
“Because you left after he told the truth.”
“I left because you ordered me out.”
“He doesn’t understand the distinction.”
“I can explain.”
“That is what I’m afraid of.”
Eleanor inhaled slowly.
“You think Nora will be satisfied with supervised visits?”
“I don’t know.”
“She will ask for custody.”
“She has parental rights.”
“And you are prepared to divide his life between that house and whatever room she rents?”
“She has an apartment now.”
“How do you know?”
“I asked.”
“You are accepting everything she says.”
“No. I’m verifying what matters.”
“With whom? Her therapist? Her friends from rehab?”
“An independent evaluator.”
Eleanor’s voice sharpened.
“You have involved outsiders.”
“They’re professionals.”
“They will know about the incident.”
“They need to.”
“And when those records appear in some court file?”
“We are not in court.”
“Not yet.”
Graham walked to the window.
Theo crouched beside a line of tracks in the snow while the property manager pointed toward the woods.
“Mother, did you ever tell Nora that Theo’s therapist recommended no contact?”
“I summarized the situation.”
“Dr. Levin never made that recommendation.”
“She said reminders caused distress.”
“She said sudden contact could cause distress. She did not say erase Nora.”
“I acted on the information available.”
“You altered it.”
May you like
“I interpreted it.”
Graham closed his eyes.
