Chương 14
“You can bill me for the resentment.”
“I already have.”
Brittany allowed Harrison to accompany her to two prenatal appointments. She did not allow him to move back into the townhouse because she was not there either.
They spoke about medical insurance, parental consent documents, the nursery furniture, and whether the baby moved more after orange juice. They did not speak about marriage.
At night, Harrison read about inherited cardiomyopathy until Simone sent him an email saying his search history did not qualify as medical training.
He stopped reading for one evening.
Then he began again with better sources.
The gossip cycle shifted. A city council corruption story displaced the paternity scandal from the front pages. Online strangers continued arguing, but fewer each day. Patricia’s role in arranging the public test became known after one of the relatives complained to a friend that she had been tricked into witnessing “a genetic ambush.” The friend repeated it to a columnist.
Patricia denied orchestrating humiliation.
No one believed the distinction she offered.
Richard moved into the guest room.
He told Harrison during a walk along the Charles, as though discussing weather.
“Is this because of me?” Harrison asked.
“It is because of thirty-nine years.”
“That sounds like something people say when it is because of one thing.”
Richard stopped near a bench overlooking the river. Runners passed behind them, shoes striking the pavement in steady rhythm.
“Your mother believes love is demonstrated by preventing weakness from becoming visible,” Richard said. “I believed love was demonstrated by quietly repairing whatever she damaged. Neither of us asked what our children needed.”
Harrison shoved his hands into his coat pockets. “Clara says the family should go to therapy.”
“Clara says many violent things.”
“She found someone.”
“For all of us?”
“For whoever agrees.”
Richard looked genuinely alarmed. “At the same time?”
“I don’t know.”
They continued walking.
After a while, Richard said, “I should have told you I knew.”
“Yes.”
“I was ashamed.”
“Of me?”
“Of being relieved the doctor told me instead of you. It meant I did not have to find the words.”
Harrison looked at his father.
Richard watched the river. “Men in my family are very good at paying people to say difficult things.”
They walked another block in silence.
A cyclist rang his bell and swore when Richard stepped into the bike lane.
Richard raised a hand. “You see? Direct communication. Efficient.”
Harrison laughed before he could stop himself.
The sound surprised both of them.
The genetic result arrived on a Thursday afternoon while Brittany was standing in a grocery store comparing two brands of pasta sauce.
Her phone rang. She saw the hospital number and forgot what she was holding.
The baby had not inherited Gabriel’s mutation.
Brittany sat down on the floor between canned tomatoes and olive oil.
The doctor continued speaking, explaining what the result did and did not rule out, recommending ordinary follow-up, reminding her that no prenatal test guaranteed a life without illness.
Brittany nodded though no one could see her.
A store employee approached cautiously. “Ma’am, are you all right?”
“Yes.”
She began crying.
The employee looked toward the front of the store. “Should I call someone?”
Brittany laughed through the tears. “Yes. Please. No. I have a phone.”
She called Harrison.
He answered before the first ring finished.
“What happened?”
“The baby doesn’t have it.”
He said nothing.
“Harrison?”
“I’m here.”
She heard him breathe. Somewhere behind him, a door closed.
“The mutation was not detected,” she said. “The doctor said the result is reliable.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes.”
“Did they say—”
“Yes. I asked.”
He let out a sound that was not quite a laugh.
Brittany pressed her hand over her mouth.
“Where are you?” he asked.
“Whole Foods.”
“Which one?”
“The one near Nora’s.”
“I’m coming.”
“You don’t need to.”
“I know.”
He arrived twenty minutes later and found her seated in the small café area with a paper cup of water. The store employee had given her a free cookie and remained nearby, pretending to wipe tables.
Harrison stopped when he saw her.
Brittany stood.
For a second they faced each other with all the caution of the previous weeks.
Then she crossed the space and put her arms around him.
He held her carefully at first, then tightly.
His face pressed into her hair. Her shoulder shook beneath his hand. Neither spoke.
The store employee moved to another table and wiped the same spot for a long time.
When they separated, Brittany touched Harrison’s cheek.
“You need to shave,” she said.
“I did.”
“Not well.”
“I came from an interview.”
“With the board?”
“Yes.”
“How was it?”
“I believe they are deciding whether I am redeemable.”
“That seems outside their expertise.”
He smiled.
She looked at him for a long moment. “Come to Nora’s for dinner.”
“Are you sure?”
“No. Come anyway.”
Nora made spaghetti and burned the garlic bread. Harrison ate two pieces and said nothing about the black edges. They discussed the test result until there was nothing left to say, then watched a documentary about competitive dog grooming because Nora refused to let medical vocabulary remain in the apartment all night.
At nine, Harrison stood to leave.
Brittany followed him into the narrow hallway.
He put on his coat beside the rack where Nora kept six scarves and no matching gloves.
“You can stay,” Brittany said.
He looked at her.
“On the sofa.”
“Of course.”
“Nora wakes at five-thirty.”
“I have survived earlier.”
“She sings while making coffee.”
“That may be the greater risk.”
Brittany smiled.
The smile disappeared slowly, leaving something more vulnerable.
“Harrison, the test result does not fix us.”
“I know.”
“I’m relieved, and I want you near me, and I am still angry.”
“I know.”
“You cannot say that to everything.”
“I am trying not to argue with accurate statements.”
May you like
She leaned against the wall. “Why did you really choose a donor who resembled you?”
He considered giving the answer he had prepared during therapy with the counselor Clara found. The counselor had asked him the same question and waited through two minutes of silence without rescuing him.
