Chương 6
She had tried to contact me.
I had never received those attempts.
There were three children.
Noelle knew.
My family knew something.
And my brother was asking me to wait before telling me what he knew.
I parked outside my apartment and sat there for almost twenty minutes.
The building looked exactly the same as it had that morning.
The same lobby lights.
The same cracked sidewalk near the entrance.
The same neighbor’s bicycle chained to the railing.
Nothing about the outside world reflected the fact that mine had changed.
Inside, the apartment was quiet.
Noelle had taken some of her things.
Not everything.
Just enough to make the place feel wrong.
Her coffee mug was gone from the kitchen shelf.
The blanket she kept folded over the couch had disappeared.
A framed photo from our trip to Maine was missing from the bookshelf.
She had not left a note.
I almost wished she had.
A note would have given me something concrete to hold.
Instead, there was only the empty space where her things had been.
I slept badly.
Not because I was thinking about Rachel.
Not only because of Rachel.
I kept seeing Noelle walking away.
The expression on her face bothered me more than anything else.
She had not looked betrayed.
She had looked like someone trying to decide whether she could trust her own judgment.
That was worse.
At seven in the morning, my phone rang.
Daniel.
I answered immediately.
“You’re awake.”
“So are you.”
“I barely slept.”
“Neither did I.”
There was a pause.
“Meet me at the coffee shop on Walnut.”
I almost said yes before realizing something.
“You’re bringing something.”
Another pause.
“I might.”
That was the closest thing to a confession I was going to get.
The coffee shop was crowded when I arrived.
People sat with laptops open.
Students whispered over notebooks.
A man near the window argued quietly on a phone call.
Normal life continued.
Daniel was sitting in the corner with two coffees.
He looked older than he had the day before.
Not physically.
Just tired.
He pushed one cup toward me.
“You still drink it black.”
I looked at the coffee.
“You remembered.”
“You make it impossible to forget.”
For a moment, we were brothers again.
Two people who had grown up sharing a bathroom and fighting over the television remote.
Then I remembered why we were there.
“What do you have?”
Daniel looked down.
“I owe you an explanation.”
“Yes.”
“I should have told you years ago.”
“Yes.”
He nodded.
“I know.”
I waited.
Daniel reached into his bag and pulled out a small envelope.
My name was not on it.
But I recognized the paper.
My stomach tightened.
“Where did you get that?”
“From Mom.”
I stared at him.
“Why does Mom have something related to Rachel?”
Daniel rubbed his face.
“Because Mom was involved.”
The words made me sit back.
“What does that mean?”
“She knew Rachel was pregnant.”
The anger came quickly.
“She knew?”
“Yes.”
“And she said nothing?”
Daniel looked uncomfortable.
“She thought she was helping.”
I laughed quietly.
“Everyone thinks they’re helping.”
“I know.”
“No, you don’t.”
My voice was sharper than I intended.
“You got to live your life while everyone else decided what I could handle.”
Daniel accepted that.
Maybe because he knew I was right.
“What did Mom know?”
Daniel looked at the envelope.
“She knew Rachel had written you.”
I froze.
“How?”
“Because Rachel called her.”
“When?”
“After you didn’t answer.”
My hands tightened around the coffee cup.
“Why didn’t Mom tell me?”
Daniel looked away.
“Because she believed the letter.”
“What letter?”
“The one you got.”
I stared at him.
“So she knew about the fake letter?”
“No.”
He shook his head.
“She thought Rachel changed her mind.”
“That’s not what happened.”
“I know that now.”
The phrase bothered me.
Everyone kept using it.
Now.
After years had passed.
After damage had already been done.
“What’s in the envelope?”
Daniel slid it toward me.
“Open it.”
I did.
Inside was a printed email.
The date was four years ago.
The sender was Rachel.
The recipient was my mother.
My hands went cold as I read.
Mrs. Carter,
I don’t know what else to do.
I have tried calling Evan, but he isn’t answering.
I need him to know about the baby.
Please tell him I am not leaving.
Please tell him I am scared.
I looked up.
“She sent this to Mom?”
Daniel nodded.
“Mom didn’t respond?”
“She did.”
“Where is it?”
Daniel looked uncomfortable.
“I don’t know.”
The answer made my anger return.
“How do you not know?”
“Because Mom deleted the conversation.”
I stared at him.
“Why?”
Daniel swallowed.
“She thought she was protecting you.”
I pushed the email back.
“No.”
“Evan.”
“No.”
I stood up.
“She was protecting herself.”
People nearby glanced over.
Daniel lowered his voice.
“Sit down.”
“I spent four years thinking Rachel abandoned me.”
“I know.”
“I rebuilt my entire life around that.”
“I know.”
“And everyone around me had pieces of the truth?”
Daniel looked down.
“I’m sorry.”
I hated that word.
Not because it was meaningless.
Because it was too small.
I sat back down.
“What else?”
Daniel looked at me.
“What?”
“What else don’t I know?”
He did not answer immediately.
That was enough.
“There’s something else.”
I felt exhausted.
“Of course there is.”
Daniel leaned forward.
“After Rachel left, I saw Claire.”
“Rachel’s sister?”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
“She came to the house.”
My eyes narrowed.
“When?”
“Two days after Rachel disappeared.”
“What did she say?”
Daniel hesitated.
“She said she had handled it.”
The words made my stomach drop.
“Handled what?”
Daniel looked miserable.
“The breakup.”
I stared at him.
“You knew?”
“No.”
“You just let that sentence exist?”
“I didn’t understand what she meant.”
“But you never asked?”
Daniel looked away.
“I was twenty-eight and stupid.”
“You were thirty.”
“Still stupid.”
Despite everything, a small part of me almost smiled.
Almost.
May you like
Then it disappeared.
“What did Claire want?”
