Chương 8
The admission tasted ugly.
"I liked walking in and having them run toward me."
Corinne leaned against the counter.
Julian looked down at his wedding ring.
"I made you the bad cop and then acted surprised when you became angry about it."
Corinne whispered, "I became more than angry."
He looked at her.
She was staring at the floor.
"Yes."
Her shoulders began to shake.
She pressed both palms to the marble.
"I kept thinking if they would just listen, I could get everything under control."
Julian said nothing.
"I made charts."
"I remember."
"Schedules."
"Yeah."
"I took snacks away for a weekend."
His eyes narrowed.
"When?"
"Two months ago."
"You said the kids had lost interest in junk food."
Corinne squeezed her eyes shut.
Julian felt anger surge again.
She kept speaking.
"It worked for two days."
"What worked?"
"They stopped arguing."
"Because they were afraid."
"I didn't see it like that."
"How did you see it?"
She opened her eyes.
"Quiet."
The word hung between them.
Julian swallowed.
Corinne wiped her nose with the back of her wrist.
"I wanted quiet."
He looked at the locked pantry.
"And every time something worked, you went further."
She nodded once.
Julian expected relief at the admission.
Instead he felt sick.
"Why Wren?"
Corinne frowned.
"What?"
"Desmond argued with you."
"He did."
"But Wren was the one losing food."
Corinne looked toward the den.
"She was easier."
Julian said nothing.
Corinne's face crumpled before she managed to stop it.
"God."
She turned away.
"I actually said that."
Julian's voice was low.
"Because it's true?"
"Because she gives in."
He closed his eyes.
Wren's shoulders curling inward came back to him.
The whispered apology.
The hand against her cheek.
Corinne spoke behind him.
"Desmond fights."
Julian opened his eyes.
"Wren doesn't."
"She cries."
"She's six."
"I know."
This time the words had no defense in them.
Julian picked up his phone.
"I'm taking her to the hospital."
Corinne nodded.
"No."
Her head lifted.
"Julian."
"No."
"I'm her mother."
"Yes."
"You can't stop me from going to the hospital with my own child."
"I can stop you from riding in my car with her."
She stared at him.
"She'll be scared."
"She's scared of you."
Corinne flinched.
Julian regretted the cruelty of the delivery, not the truth.
"I should be there."
"Not today."
"Then what am I supposed to do?"
He looked toward the den.
"Stay away from both children until I know what the professionals tell me to do."
Her eyes widened.
"You're telling me I can't see my son?"
"I'm telling you I'm not leaving him alone with you right now."
Corinne took a step backward.
"You think I'm going to hurt Desmond?"
Julian glanced at the bruise on the boy's wrist in his phone.
"I think I don't know what you might do when you're desperate."
Her expression changed.
Julian saw fear sharpen into something else.
"What does that mean?"
"It means you deleted his email."
"That doesn't mean I'm dangerous."
"You grabbed him hard enough to bruise him."
"I was angry."
"You locked Wren in a pantry by accident because you had already decided a pantry needed a padlock."
Corinne covered her face.
Julian's voice dropped.
"I'm not gambling with them."
A floorboard creaked in the den.
They both looked toward the doorway.
Desmond stood there.
He had heard enough.
"Can I come with Wren?"
Julian nodded.
"Yes."
Corinne said, "Desmond."
The boy stopped.
She looked at him.
Whatever she had intended to say disappeared.
Her fingers twisted around her wedding ring again.
"I love you."
Desmond's face tightened.
Corinne swallowed.
"I do."
"I know."
His answer was so quiet that she nearly missed it.
Hope flickered across her face.
Then Desmond added, "That's why this is confusing."
Corinne looked as if something had struck her in the chest.
Desmond walked past her and went upstairs to get his shoes.
Julian stood beside the table.
Neither adult spoke.
A minute later the front door opened.
Desmond returned carrying Wren's pink cardigan.
"I thought she might be cold at the hospital."
Julian nodded.
"Good thinking."
Corinne watched her son.
"Des."
He paused again.
She took one step toward him, then stopped herself.
"I am sorry."
Desmond stared at her.
"For which thing?"
Corinne's mouth opened.
No answer came.
Desmond looked away.
Julian put the recorder into his jacket pocket.
Corinne noticed.
"You're taking that?"
"Yes."
"Julian."
"It stays with me."
She looked at the pocket, then at his face.
"You already think this marriage is over."
He did not answer immediately.
The silence hurt both of them.
Finally he said, "I think I don't know what this marriage was happening around."
Corinne lowered her eyes.
Julian walked to the mudroom.
He removed both padlock keys from the hook, including the one Desmond handed him from his pocket.
Then he came back with the bolt cutters from the garage.
Corinne watched without speaking.
He cut the pantry lock first.
Metal snapped against metal with a hard, ugly crack.
Then he cut the refrigerator lock.
Both fell onto the tile.
Julian picked them up.
For a moment he considered throwing them away.
Instead he put them in a grocery bag.
Corinne frowned.
"Why are you keeping those?"
"Because they existed."
He tied the bag closed.
Then he and Desmond crossed the lawn to Mrs. Alvarez's house.
Wren was sitting at her kitchen table eating strawberries from a chipped green bowl.
When she saw Julian, her hand stopped halfway to her mouth.
"Are we going home?"
"Not yet."
Her eyes moved toward the mansion.
"Is Mom mad?"
Julian crouched beside her.
"No one is going to be mad at you."
Wren studied him carefully.
"Even if I ate?"
Julian felt Mrs. Alvarez turn away toward the sink.
He rested his hands loosely on his knees so Wren would not feel trapped.
"Especially if you ate."
Her lower lip trembled.
He waited.
May you like
Finally she put the strawberry in her mouth.
Desmond sat beside her.
