Chương 10
Rachel’s stomach turned.
“So you went back.”
“Yes.”
“The video shows you by the cabana when police arrived.”
“Yes.”
“And Daniel?”
“I don’t know where he went for about ninety seconds.”
Rachel looked at Lena.
Lena’s expression had sharpened.
“Where did he go?” Rachel asked.
Claire looked toward her attorney again.
Then back.
“He tried to get into the security office.”
Rachel did not move.
“What?”
“He said they had cameras.”
Feldman leaned forward.
“Ms. Morgan did not accompany him into any office.”
Rachel barely heard him.
“He knew.”
Claire nodded.
“He knew the camera might show Emma at the door.”
“What did he do?”
“I don’t know exactly. The office was locked. A security employee was already reviewing footage inside.”
Rachel remembered Marcus arriving on the rooftop.
“He tried to delete it.”
“I can’t say that.”
“He tried to get to it.”
“Yes.”
Rachel stood.
Lena touched her wrist.
“Rachel.”
She pulled away.
Claire flinched.
Rachel looked at her and suddenly saw not an elegant woman in a cream jumpsuit, not the person from the recording, not the imagined rival who had occupied six months of suspicion.
She saw a thirty-five-year-old woman who had made a series of cowardly decisions and discovered they did not become less cowardly because someone else had made worse ones.
Rachel hated her.
Rachel also believed her.
That was inconvenient.
“Are you telling the police this?”
“I already did.”
“When?”
“Yesterday.”
“Why?”
Claire looked at her coffee.
“Because Daniel’s lawyer contacted mine and suggested we should be consistent.”
Lena said, “Consistent about what?”
Claire’s mouth tightened.
“He wanted us to say we left the cabana before Emma arrived.”
Rachel almost smiled.
There it was.
The second door.
Daniel had closed the first on his daughter.
Now he was trying to close one on reality.
“What did you tell him?”
Claire looked directly at Rachel.
“No.”
For the first time, Rachel understood why Claire had asked to meet.
It was not absolution.
It was warning.
Daniel was still managing.
That night, Rachel sat on the floor outside Emma’s bedroom.
She had done that twice when Emma was a baby during sleep-training attempts, though she had usually given up after eight minutes and brought her into bed.
Now Emma was six.
The door was open.
A night-light projected pale stars across the ceiling.
“Mommy?”
“Yes.”
“Why are you on the floor?”
“My back hurts.”
“You said the floor makes it worse.”
“That’s an excellent point.”
Emma rolled onto her side.
“Is Daddy coming home?”
Rachel looked at the hallway rug.
“No.”
“Ever?”
There were questions adults prepared for and questions children invented because they did not know they were supposed to soften them.
“Not to live here.”
Emma was quiet.
“Because he locked the door?”
Rachel swallowed.
“Because Daddy and I have grown-up problems.”
“Because of Claire?”
Rachel looked up.
“How do you know her name?”
“Daddy said it.”
“When?”
“At the party.”
The room seemed to cool.
“What did he say?”
Emma picked at the ear of her stuffed rabbit.
“He said, ‘Claire, wait.’”
Rachel let out a breath.
“Okay.”
“Is she his girlfriend?”
“Who told you that?”
“Nobody.”
“How do you know the word girlfriend?”
“Maya’s dad has one.”
Of course he did.
Rachel rubbed her eyes.
“Daddy and Claire had a relationship they shouldn’t have had while Daddy and I were married.”
Emma frowned.
“So yes?”
Rachel almost laughed.
“Yes.”
“Are you mad?”
“Yes.”
“Forever?”
“I don’t know.”
Emma thought about that.
“I’m mad too.”
“You can be.”
“But I miss him.”
Rachel felt something break softly.
“You can do both.”
Emma looked relieved.
“Can he call?”
Rachel had not expected the question.
The temporary arrangement allowed supervised phone contact if Emma requested it.
Lena had insisted on the words if Emma requested it.
Rachel picked up her phone.
“Now?”
Emma nodded.
Daniel answered on the first ring.
“Rachel?”
“It’s Emma.”
Silence.
Then, “Okay.”
Rachel switched to video and handed the phone over.
Daniel appeared in a hotel room.
He had not shaved.
Emma said, “Hi.”
Daniel smiled.
It was the saddest smile Rachel had ever seen on him.
“Hi, Em.”
“I have school tomorrow.”
“I know.”
“We have gym.”
“Good.”
“I don’t like gym.”
“I know.”
“You said good.”
“I meant good that you’re going to school.”
“Oh.”
A pause.
Daniel said, “How’s Bunny?”
Emma held the stuffed rabbit in front of the screen.
“He smells like soap.”
“Your mom washed him?”
“She forgot and then did it.”
Rachel looked away.
Emma said, “Daddy?”
“Yeah?”
“Did you lock me because Claire was your girlfriend?”
Daniel froze.
Rachel stood.
“Emma—”
“No,” Daniel said.
Rachel looked at the screen.
He took a breath.
“I closed the door because I was doing something wrong and I was scared.”
Emma frowned.
“Of Mommy?”
“Yes.”
“Mommy doesn’t lock doors.”
Rachel closed her eyes.
Daniel looked like he had been struck again.
“No,” he said. “She doesn’t.”
“Why didn’t you open it?”
His eyes filled.
“I should have.”
“That’s not why.”
Rachel’s breath caught.
Daniel nodded slowly.
“You’re right.”
Emma waited.
He looked directly into the camera.
“Because I was thinking about myself.”
Rachel sat down.
Daniel continued.
“I wish I could change that.”
Emma picked at Bunny’s ear.
“Can you?”
“No.”
“Then why do grown-ups say that?”
Daniel glanced away.
“I don’t know.”
“Mommy says it too.”
Rachel said, “Thank you.”
Emma smiled slightly.
Daniel almost did.
Then Emma asked, “Are police mad at you?”
Rachel reached for the phone.
Daniel said, “Some people are asking me questions.”
“Are you going to jail?”
“Emma,” Rachel said.
Daniel’s face tightened.
“I don’t know.”
That was not the answer Rachel would have chosen.
It may have been the right one.
Emma looked down.
“I don’t want you to.”
Rachel felt anger rise, then shame at the anger.
Daniel whispered, “I know.”
“I want you to be sorry.”
“I am.”
“For real.”
“I am.”
Emma handed the phone back to Rachel.
“I’m done.”
May you like
Rachel took it.
Daniel said, “Good night, Em.”
