Chương 5
“Try not to—”
She turned.
Walter stopped.
“Try not to what?”
He considered it.
“Never mind.”
“Good choice.”
Daniel lived fifteen minutes away in a townhouse with a narrow driveway and a dead potted rosemary plant he had been pretending was dormant for six months.
Rachel knocked once.
He opened the door.
“You found out.”
Rachel held up the printed email.
Daniel closed his eyes.
“Yeah.”
She walked inside.
He shut the door.
His living room looked like a man had purchased furniture by accepting every recommendation on a single website. Gray couch. Gray rug. Gray television console.
Rachel had made fun of him for it before.
Today she stood in the middle of the room and said, “Two years.”
Daniel shoved his hands into his pockets.
“I know.”
“Do you?”
“Yes.”
“No, Daniel. Explain it to me.”
He looked toward the kitchen.
“Want coffee?”
Rachel stared at him.
“Right. Sorry.”
He sat on the arm of the couch.
She remained standing.
“When he emailed me, I didn’t know what to do.”
“You could have told me.”
“I was going to.”
“But?”
“Mom found out.”
“How?”
“She saw his name on my laptop when I was at the house.”
Rachel nodded.
That sounded exactly like Eleanor. Not spying. Simply noticing everything and then insisting noticing was morally neutral.
“What did she say?”
“That you were finally getting stable.”
“I was barely functioning.”
“You looked stable.”
“That’s not the same.”
“I know that now.”
“What else?”
Daniel rubbed his palms together.
“She said if Evan wanted to talk to you, he knew how. She said sending me an email was cowardly.”
“That part is true.”
“She said telling you would drag you backward.”
“And Lauren?”
“She agreed.”
Rachel laughed.
Daniel looked miserable.
“Did you answer him?”
“Yes.”
“What did you say?”
“That Sophie was okay.”
“Anything else?”
“I told him not to contact me again unless he was ready to contact you.”
Rachel looked at him.
“That was your big act of courage?”
“No.”
“At least you know.”
“I know.”
She sat down across from him.
Anger moved strangely once you were tired enough. It stopped feeling hot. It became heavy.
“Do you still have the email?”
“Yes.”
“Do you have his address?”
“It bounced the last time I tried.”
“When did you try?”
“This morning.”
Rachel looked at him.
“You tried today?”
“After Dad started talking.”
“Why didn’t you say that on the phone?”
“Because you were already angry.”
“I was already angry when I came here.”
“I’m aware.”
She almost smiled.
Almost.
Daniel stood and went to the kitchen.
He returned with a glass of water for himself.
He did not offer Rachel anything this time.
Progress.
“Did Evan ever say what Lauren knew?”
“No.”
“Did you ask?”
“I did.”
“And?”
“He said it wasn’t his story to tell until he could prove it.”
“Very noble.”
Daniel looked at her.
“You’re allowed to hate him.”
“I don’t know what I’m allowed to feel.”
“That too.”
Rachel leaned back.
“Dad found records showing Lauren took money.”
“I know.”
“He found records showing Evan approved some of it.”
Daniel nodded.
“Did you know about that?”
“No.”
“Anything else you’ve been sitting on for multiple years?”
He winced.
“Fair.”
“I’m serious.”
Daniel stared at the floor.
There it was again.
The doorway silence.
Rachel waited.
Finally he said, “The week Evan left, I saw him at the workshop.”
“What day?”
“Tuesday. Maybe Wednesday.”
“He left Thursday.”
“Wednesday, then.”
“What happened?”
“He and Lauren were arguing in the conference room.”
“About what?”
“I couldn’t hear everything.”
“Try.”
Daniel shut his eyes.
“He said, ‘You changed it after I signed.’”
Rachel did not move.
“And Lauren?”
“She said he had no proof.”
“Anything else?”
“He told her he was going to Dad.”
“Then?”
Daniel’s voice became quieter.
“She said, ‘And I’ll go to Rachel.’”
Rachel swallowed.
“What did that mean?”
“I didn’t know.”
“You never asked.”
“No.”
“Why?”
“Because I thought it was work.”
“You thought Evan threatening to go to Dad and Lauren threatening to go to me was work?”
“I was twenty-eight and stupid.”
“You’re thirty-one.”
“I remain stupid in several important areas.”
This time Rachel did laugh.
It lasted one second.
Then she covered her face.
Daniel sat beside her.
He did not touch her.
“Rachel.”
“What?”
“I’m sorry.”
She lowered her hands.
He was crying.
Not dramatically.
His eyes were simply wet.
“You should be.”
“I know.”
She looked toward his blank television.
After a while she asked, “Can we find him?”
“I can try.”
“No.”
Daniel looked at her.
“I mean, yes, but not secretly. Not like this family does everything.”
“What do you want to do?”
Rachel thought about Sophie asleep beside her.
About the question in the car.
Did Dad disappear because of you?
“I want facts before I put him back into her life.”
Daniel nodded.
“And if the facts are bad?”
“Then they’re bad.”
“You still want them?”
Rachel looked at her brother.
“Yes.”
Finding Evan did not require a private investigator.
That surprised Rachel.
It required patience, an old address, three dead ends, one returned letter, and a former coworker who initially refused to talk to her.
His name was Anthony Vega.
Rachel remembered him vaguely from one company Christmas party.
When she called, he said, “I don’t think Evan wants me giving out his information.”
“I’m not asking for his address.”
“Sounds like you are.”
“I’m asking you to give him mine.”
Anthony was quiet.
“What happened?”
“Family Thanksgiving.”
“That sounds dangerous.”
“You have no idea.”
She gave him her number and hung up.
For four days nothing happened.
During those four days, Walter hired an outside accountant.
Lauren stopped answering everyone except Eleanor.
Eleanor called Rachel seven times.
Rachel answered once.
“I don’t want Sophie around Lauren right now.”
“Lauren is upset.”
“So is Sophie.”
“She feels attacked.”
“She threatened an eight-year-old.”
“She said something in anger.”
“She used Sophie’s father to hurt her.”
“You hit her.”
May you like
“Yes.”
“You don’t seem remorseful.”
