Chương 5
The humor left.
“Mara.”
“What did he say?”
“I wasn’t there.”
“You were coming through the north gate.”
“After.”
“Before we went back.”
“Mara.”
“Just answer.”
Lena leaned back.
“You’re asking because of Weller’s line.”
“Yes.”
“No, I don’t remember exactly.”
Mara nodded.
Lena watched her.
“Pike went with you.”
“Yes.”
“Reeve went with you.”
“Yes.”
“Two crash crew guys went through the other side.”
“Yes.”
“Nobody ran.”
“I know.”
“Then say that.”
“To who?”
“Everyone.”
Mara laughed without amusement.
Lena pointed at her phone.
“Apparently everyone.”
“I don’t want to become the correcting-the-record lady.”
“Better than becoming Captain America in a bikini.”
Mara looked at her.
Lena shrugged.
“Sorry.”
“No. That was good.”
“I’ve been awake since four.”
“You’re funnier tired.”
“I’m meaner tired.”
They sat quietly.
After a while Lena said, “You know what people are going to do.”
“Yes.”
“They’re going to dig.”
“I know.”
“They’ll find the commendation.”
“It’s public.”
“They’ll find Pike.”
Mara looked away.
Lena’s voice softened.
“They’ll find the casualty report.”
“Parts of it.”
“They won’t understand it.”
“No.”
“They’ll pretend they do.”
“Yes.”
Lena reached across the table and took Mara’s mug before she could drink more cold coffee.
“Go to bed.”
“I’m not tired.”
“You look ninety.”
“Thank you.”
“Go.”
Mara stood.
At the doorway she stopped.
“Lena?”
“Yeah?”
“Did I get him killed?”
Lena did not ask who.
Eight years had passed and she did not need to.
She looked at Mara for a long time.
“No.”
Mara waited.
Lena sighed.
“But I know me saying it isn’t going to fix whatever part of you still asks.”
Mara nodded.
That was why they were friends.
By six the next morning, the story had outrun all of them.
The first national headline Mara saw called her a “decorated Navy hero.”
The second called Sloane a “hotel heiress.”
Neither description felt like a person.
The third was worse.
SCARRED VETERAN HUMILIATED AT ELITE POOL PARTY—THEN ADMIRAL REVEALS WHO SHE REALLY IS.
Mara closed the browser.
Ethan stood at the condo counter making coffee with a machine he did not understand.
“How do people live like this?”
“It’s a Keurig.”
“It has four buttons.”
“Yes.”
“None of them say coffee.”
“The picture of the cup.”
“That could mean rinse.”
“You have a machine at home that grinds beans according to altitude.”
“That machine is honest about its intentions.”
Mara watched him press the wrong button.
Hot water dribbled into the mug.
Neither of them laughed.
His phone rang.
He looked at it.
“My mother.”
“Answer.”
“I don’t want to.”
“Then don’t.”
He silenced it.
Thirty seconds later it rang again.
This time he picked up.
“Mom.”
Mara went to the balcony.
Morning traffic moved along the street below. A delivery truck idled beside a dry cleaner. Somebody in the building across the courtyard watered a fern.
She could still hear Ethan.
“No, she hasn’t made a statement.”
Pause.
“No, I’m not asking her to.”
Pause.
“Because that’s insane.”
Longer pause.
“Mom, Sloane hit her.”
Mara leaned against the railing.
“I understand that,” Ethan said. “No, I do. But the foundation is not the victim here.”
Another pause.
His voice lowered.
“I’m not discussing the engagement.”
Mara looked back through the glass.
Ethan was facing away from her.
He listened for nearly a minute.
Then said, “I’ll call you later,” and ended it.
Mara stepped inside.
“What was that?”
He poured out the hot water and tried again.
“Nothing.”
“Don’t do that.”
He looked at her.
“My mother wants to know whether we’re postponing the wedding.”
Mara stared at him.
“Why?”
“Because she thinks any wedding planning right now will look…”
He stopped.
“Look what?”
“Insensitive.”
“To whom?”
“I don’t know.”
“To me?”
“I told you, I don’t know.”
Mara walked to the fridge.
There was almost nothing inside except mustard, two bottles of white wine, and a plastic container labeled SOUP.
She took out the soup.
Ethan watched her.
“You’re heating soup at seven in the morning?”
“I’m hungry.”
“It’s lentil.”
“I can read.”
“Mara.”
She shut the refrigerator.
“What?”
“My mother is panicking.”
“I know.”
“She’s wrong.”
“Okay.”
“You sound like you don’t believe me.”
“I believe you think she’s wrong.”
His face changed.
“What does that mean?”
“It means yesterday, when your sister hit me, you said my name.”
He set down the coffee pod.
“We already did this.”
“No, you apologized and I was too tired to keep talking.”
“I froze.”
“I know.”
“I’ve never seen her do anything like that.”
“I know.”
“I was trying to understand what had happened.”
“I know.”
“Can you stop saying that?”
Mara crossed her arms.
Ethan leaned against the counter.
“I failed you for maybe thirty seconds.”
“Longer.”
“Fine. A minute. Two. I’m not proud of it. But I’m here.”
“Where else would you be?”
“With my family trying to put out a fire.”
“You said it.”
His eyes narrowed.
“That’s not what I meant.”
“It’s what they think this is.”
“It is a fire, Mara. That doesn’t mean you started it.”
She looked down.
There was a tiny coffee stain on the counter.
She wiped it with her thumb.
Ethan came around the island.
“I love you.”
She hated him a little for saying it then.
Not because she doubted him.
Because love was not the question.
“I love you too.”
He waited.
She picked up the soup.
“That’s it?”
“What do you want?”
“I don’t know. Something.”
“Something like what?”
“Tell me we’re okay.”
Mara looked at him.
He understood before she answered.
His shoulders dropped.
“Oh.”
“I don’t know if we’re okay.”
“Mara.”
“I’m not ending anything this morning.”
“That’s comforting.”
“I’m trying not to lie to you.”
He turned away.
His coffee machine beeped.
Neither of them moved toward it.
At eight fifteen, Rear Admiral Thomas Weller called.
Mara answered from the balcony.
“Sir.”
“Ms. Vance.”
“You can call me Mara.”
“Then you can call me Tom.”
“No.”
May you like
He made a sound that might have been amusement.
“Fair enough.”
