Chương 2
“Who are you?”
He swallowed.
Not dramatically.
Just once.
“Emily.”
“No.”
The charge nurse touched her elbow.
Emily pulled away.
Noah was crying harder now, his small face reddening above the blanket. The sound cut through everything.
Her body responded before her mind did. She turned slightly, rocking him against her chest, whispering nonsense into the fine dark hair at the top of his head.
“It’s okay. I know. I know, sweetheart.”
Adrian took one involuntary step toward them.
Emily looked up.
He stopped.
That tiny obedience hurt more than she expected.
Security separated the men. One officer led Derek toward a consultation room while the other told Adrian to remain in the corridor.
Derek looked over his shoulder.
“Ask him what I paid him for.”
Adrian’s eyes closed for half a second.
Emily heard herself say, “What?”
Derek smiled.
Then the consultation-room door shut behind him.
The maternity corridor resumed making ordinary sounds.
A cart rolled somewhere near the elevators.
A monitor beeped behind a closed door.
Noah hiccupped between cries.
Rachel removed the registration form from Adrian’s hands.
“I need this back.”
He gave it to her.
She looked down, saw his signature beside the father field, and rubbed her forehead.
“For everyone’s understanding,” she said, “writing your name on the hospital worksheet does not by itself establish legal paternity.”
“I know.”
Rachel looked at him sharply.
Emily did too.
Of course he knew.
The charge nurse finally convinced Emily to return to her room.
Adrian was not permitted inside.
Emily was grateful for the rule because she had no idea whether she wanted him close enough to touch or far enough away that she could pretend the last five minutes had not happened.
Rachel came with her.
She shut the door and drew the privacy curtain halfway across the small room even though there was no second patient.
Emily sat on the bed with difficulty.
The soreness of delivery, the exhaustion, the bruise on her cheek, the sleepless night, Derek’s arrival, Adrian’s face—everything seemed to be competing for space inside the same body.
Rachel adjusted Noah’s blanket.
“Do you want me to take him to the bassinet for a minute?”
“No.”
“That’s fine.”
“I’m not putting him down.”
“That’s also fine.”
Rachel pulled the visitor chair closer but did not sit.
For a few seconds neither woman spoke.
Emily looked at the clipboard in Rachel’s hand.
“Is his name still there?”
Rachel understood.
“Yes.”
“Can you erase it?”
“I can print another worksheet.”
Emily stared at Noah.
Rachel waited.
Emily said, “Don’t.”
Rachel’s eyebrows moved slightly.
“I don’t know what I want yet.”
“You don’t have to.”
“Apparently everybody else does.”
Rachel gave a tired, humorless smile.
“That happens a lot around babies.”
It was such an ordinary sentence that Emily nearly cried.
Instead she laughed once.
The sound broke halfway through.
Rachel sat down.
“I need to ask you something because of the bruise.”
Emily’s hand rose to her left cheek.
She had almost forgotten it was visible.
“Did Mr. Hayes cause that?”
Emily looked toward the door.
“Yes.”
“When?”
“Six days ago.”
“Did you seek medical treatment?”
“No.”
“Did anyone see it happen?”
“No.”
Rachel did not sigh, judge, or tell her what she should have done.
“Do you feel safe leaving the hospital?”
Emily looked down at Noah.
“No.”
That answer changed the next three hours.
A hospital social worker named Denise arrived carrying a paper cup of tea Emily never drank. A city police officer took photographs of the bruise. Another officer interviewed Rachel and the two visitors who had seen Derek slam the clipboard against the wall.
Security reviewed corridor footage.
Adrian waited in a room on the opposite end of the floor.
Derek was examined for a cut lip and swelling along his jaw, then interviewed separately.
The world did not reorganize itself around Emily’s confusion. Noah needed feeding. A nursing assistant came to check Emily’s blood pressure. Someone from dietary services delivered a tray with chicken soup and gelatin. The soup went cold.
At one point Emily realized Adrian’s black-and-gold pen was lying beside the plastic water pitcher.
Rachel must have set it there accidentally.
Emily stared at it for a long time.
She had seen the pen before.
Adrian always carried it.
He used to click it while reading.
She had complained about the noise.
He had bought a quieter pen.
Then he had lost that one and gone back to the black-and-gold pen.
That memory did not reveal anything.
It was only irritatingly normal.
Denise sat beside the window filling out a safety questionnaire.
“Is Mr. Hayes the baby’s father?”
“No.”
“Is Mr. Cole?”
Emily looked at the pen.
“Yes.”
It was the first time she had said it aloud to anyone in the hospital.
Denise’s expression did not change.
“Does Mr. Cole know?”
“He does now.”
Emily almost laughed again.
“No. That’s not true. He knew. I told him before he disappeared.”
Denise lowered the form.
“He disappeared?”
“Four months ago.”
“Was there conflict between you?”
“There was going to be.”
Denise waited.
Emily shifted Noah higher against her shoulder.
“I found out I was pregnant. I told Adrian. He stared at me for about ten seconds and then asked if I was sure.”
“That upset you.”
“I threw a dish towel at him.”
Denise’s mouth twitched.
Emily looked at the window.
“He apologized. Then he got quiet for a few days. I thought he was scared. I was scared too.”
“Did he tell you he was leaving?”
“No.”
“What happened?”
“He went to work one morning.”
“And?”
“He never came home.”
The words were still humiliating.
Even now.
Even after seeing him in the corridor.
Emily had called thirty-one times before accepting that the calls were going straight to voicemail on purpose. She had contacted the small security-consulting company he said he worked for and learned that he had resigned weeks earlier.
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His apartment had already been cleared.
The landlord told her the lease had ended.
