Chương 13
The words came out steady.
He had not planned them.
Once spoken, they felt irreversible.
Corinne stopped crying.
“What?”
“We’re going somewhere else tonight.”
“You don’t get to decide that by yourself.”
“I know.”
“Then why are you saying it like it’s done?”
“Because if they tell me I’m allowed to leave with them, I’m not taking them back into that house today.”
“That is my home.”
“It’s theirs too.”
“So I’m the one being removed.”
Julian rubbed his jaw.
“For tonight, yes.”
“No.”
Her voice sharpened instantly.
“No, you are not doing this.”
Emily lifted a hand again.
Julian held up one finger, asking for a moment.
Corinne continued.
“You are not taking my children away from me.”
“I’m not taking them away.”
“You just said you’re not bringing them home.”
“For one night.”
“You don’t know that.”
“No.”
“And there it is again.”
Her anger was rising now because anger was easier than fear.
Julian knew the pattern.
He had loved her through it for years.
He had also helped protect it.
“You need help, Corinne.”
She laughed bitterly.
“Oh, now we’re there.”
“I’m not insulting you.”
“You sound exactly like my mother.”
That stopped him.
Corinne’s voice changed.
“She used to say that whenever I cried.”
Julian closed his eyes.
“You need help.”
“She would say it like I was defective.”
“Corinne.”
“I hated those words.”
Julian waited.
When he spoke again, he chose them carefully.
“Then I’ll use different ones.”
She said nothing.
“You cannot handle this by yourself anymore.”
Her breathing slowed slightly.
Julian continued.
“And I cannot pretend you can.”
There was another long silence.
Then Corinne whispered, “What if they hate me?”
Julian looked toward the door.
“I don’t know.”
“What if Wren never trusts me again?”
“I don’t know.”
“What if Desmond doesn’t either?”
Julian felt his throat tighten.
“I don’t know.”
Corinne began crying again.
This time he let her.
He did not rush to fix it.
He did not tell her the children loved her.
He did not promise repair.
He did not offer a version of the future designed to stop her pain.
After nearly a minute, she said, “I unplugged the camera because I couldn’t watch another clip.”
Julian swallowed.
“Okay.”
“There are more.”
“I know.”
“I only watched four.”
“Okay.”
“One was from last night.”
Julian closed his eyes.
Corinne continued.
“Desmond came down with her.”
His hand tightened around the phone.
“He sat outside the pantry.”
Julian listened.
“He had his school blanket.”
Julian frowned.
Desmond had kept a navy fleece blanket from preschool, though he denied caring about it.
Corinne’s voice trembled.
“He wrapped it around her shoulders while she ate.”
Julian bent forward until his elbow rested on his knee.
“He was watching the stairs.”
Emily’s eyes lowered.
Corinne whispered, “He was watching for me.”
Julian could not answer.
A soft knock sounded at the door.
Emily stood.
Wren stepped in first.
She was holding Desmond’s hand.
The reddish bruise on her cheek looked darker under the fluorescent light.
She saw Julian’s face.
“Daddy?”
He straightened.
“I’m here.”
Wren walked toward him.
Corinne heard her voice through the phone.
“Is that her?”
Julian looked at Wren.
“Yes.”
“Can I talk to her?”
Wren saw her mother’s name glowing on the screen.
Her fingers tightened around Desmond’s hand.
Julian did not answer for her.
He lowered the phone.
“Mom wants to talk to you.”
Wren looked at Desmond.
Then at Julian.
Then at the phone.
She shook her head.
Julian raised it back to his ear.
“Not right now.”
Corinne was silent.
A few seconds later, she whispered, “Okay.”
The acceptance seemed to cost her more than any argument had.
Emily opened the door wider.
A second woman waited in the hallway beside her.
Emily looked at Julian.
“My supervisor is here.”
Julian nodded.
Corinne heard.
“I should go.”
“Yes.”
“Julian?”
He waited.
“Don’t let them throw away the food in Desmond’s bag.”
He frowned.
“Why?”
Corinne took a shaky breath.
“Because I need to see it.”
Julian looked at Wren.
Then at Desmond.
“No.”
Corinne went quiet.
Julian’s voice softened.
“You don’t need to punish yourself with it.”
“That’s not why.”
“Then why?”
She breathed in.
“Because I need to stop telling myself this wasn’t real.”
Julian had no answer for that.
For once, Corinne did not ask him to provide one.
“I’ll leave everything alone,” she said.
“Okay.”
“Tell them that.”
The call ended.
Wren climbed onto Julian’s lap without asking.
He wrapped one arm around her carefully.
Desmond stood close enough that his shoulder touched Julian’s knee.
Emily’s supervisor entered and introduced herself, but Julian barely heard the name.
Wren rested her head against his chest.
Her breathing was warm through his shirt.
Emily sat across from him.
“We need to talk about where the children will stay tonight.”
Julian tightened his arm around Wren.
For the first time all day, the next decision did not feel like something happening to him.
It felt like something he would have to make.
Emily’s supervisor pulled a chair closer and asked Julian whether there was any adult outside the immediate household who could take the children if needed.
Julian gave his brother’s name.
Then he gave the address of the company apartment.
The supervisor wrote both down.
“Would your wife have access to that apartment?”
“She knows it exists.”
“Does she have a key?”
“I don’t think so.”
Emily looked up.
Julian corrected himself.
“No.”
The word felt better because this time he had actually considered it.
The supervisor asked whether Julian was willing to agree that Corinne would have no unsupervised contact with either child until the agency completed its initial safety assessment.
“Yes.”
He answered before Corinne’s face could rise in his mind.
Desmond looked at him.
Wren did not.
She had found one of the buttons on Julian’s shirt and was rubbing its edge with her thumb.
Emily said, “That includes going back to the home together tonight.”
May you like
“I understand.”
“And if your wife comes to the apartment?”
