Chương 8
Then he called Madison.
She answered on the second ring.
“Hi.”
Her voice was careful.
“Did you tell Richard I deserved to decide?”
Silence.
“Yes.”
“Then why didn’t you let me?”
Another silence.
“I don’t have an answer that makes me look good.”
“I’m not asking for one that makes you look good.”
“I kept hoping I could control the outcome.”
Daniel stared through his office window at traffic moving along Wilson Boulevard.
“That sounds like your mother.”
“I know.”
“Did he ask you for money?”
“Yes.”
The direct answer surprised him.
“How?”
“He said his landlord was threatening eviction after he missed two months.”
“And you gave him two thousand dollars.”
“Yes.”
“Did you verify anything?”
“No.”
“Why?”
“I believed him.”
“Did he pay you back?”
“No.”
“Did he say he would?”
“Yes.”
Daniel rubbed his forehead.
“Madison.”
“I know.”
“No, listen. I’m not only angry because it was my father.”
“I know.”
“You hid money. You lied about where you were. You met him three times. You involved Ethan. You planned to marry me before telling me any of it.”
“Yes.”
“And every time you reached a point where telling me would become harder, you made the next decision that made it harder again.”
Her breath shook.
“Yes.”
He looked at the letter.
“Why the wedding day?”
“He showed up early.”
“He was supposed to come later?”
“He was supposed to check in after the ceremony.”
Daniel closed his eyes.
“He was actually supposed to be there.”
“Yes.”
“Not just some possibility.”
“Yes.”
“And after the reception?”
“I was going to ask you to come upstairs with me.”
“To Room 814.”
“Yes.”
Daniel leaned back.
“What did you think would happen?”
“I don’t know.”
“Try.”
Madison was quiet.
“I pictured you being angry.”
“Accurate.”
“I pictured you refusing to go in.”
“Also accurate.”
“I thought I would tell you that you didn’t have to forgive him. Just listen.”
Daniel closed his eyes.
“You planned my reaction.”
“Yes.”
“You planned your response to my reaction.”
“Yes.”
“You planned the conditions under which I would see him.”
“Yes.”
“And you still thought this was a gift.”
Madison began crying quietly.
“I did.”
Daniel stared at the ceiling.
“That is terrifying.”
“I know.”
“No. Stop saying that.”
“I’m sorry.”
He heard her trying to control her breathing.
“I loved the idea of healing you,” she said.
Daniel did not answer.
“I hate saying that.”
“Keep going.”
“I think I liked being the person who could give you something no one else could. I told myself that was love.”
Daniel looked down at his hand.
The pale band where his watch usually rested was visible beneath his cuff.
“What was it?”
“Ego.”
The word stayed between them.
Madison continued.
“Grief. Control. Maybe arrogance. I don’t know. All of it.”
“That sounds closer.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Did your mother tell you not to do it?”
“Yes.”
“How many times?”
“A lot.”
“And she helped anyway.”
“Yes.”
Daniel rubbed his eyes.
“Ethan wants to know if you’re mad at him.”
A sound escaped Madison.
“Oh, God.”
“He thinks the wedding ended because he showed the card.”
“Please let me talk to him.”
“I will.”
“When?”
“Tonight.”
She became quiet.
“Okay.”
“But you are not going to explain Richard.”
“I won’t.”
“You are not going to tell him we’ll get married later.”
Her breath caught.
“I won’t.”
“You’re going to tell him he did the right thing by answering my question.”
“I will.”
“And that adults are responsible for adult secrets.”
“Yes.”
Daniel stood and walked toward the window.
“Six-thirty.”
“Okay.”
He almost hung up.
“Daniel?”
“What?”
“Thank you.”
He ended the call.
At six-thirty, Madison called on video.
She was at Evelyn’s house, sitting in the guest bedroom wearing jeans and a gray sweater Daniel recognized. She had bought it during a weekend in Boston because he said the color made her eyes look green.
Ethan sat beside Daniel on the couch.
For the first minute, nobody knew what to say.
Then Ethan asked, “Where’s your wedding dress?”
Madison laughed and cried at the same time.
“It’s in a bag.”
“Why?”
“Because it’s not a good school outfit.”
Ethan smiled.
Daniel looked down.
Madison took a breath.
“Hey, buddy. I need to tell you something important.”
Ethan nodded.
“You remember the card?”
“Yes.”
“You did the right thing telling your dad about it.”
Ethan looked at Daniel, then back at the screen.
“But you said hide it.”
“I did.”
“Why?”
“Because I made a bad choice.”
He frowned.
“Like lying?”
Madison swallowed.
“Yes.”
Daniel looked at her.
Ethan considered.
“Are you in trouble?”
Madison almost smiled.
“A little.”
“Did Dad ground you?”
Daniel covered his mouth.
Madison laughed despite herself.
“No.”
“Then what trouble?”
“Grown-up trouble.”
Ethan thought about that.
“That sounds worse.”
“It can be.”
He leaned closer to the screen.
“Are you mad at me?”
“No.”
“Promise?”
“I promise.”
“You cried.”
“I cried because I was sad about what I did. Not because of you.”
Ethan looked down at his hands.
“I told everybody.”
“You told your dad.”
“There were people.”
“I know.”
“Like two hundred.”
Madison covered her mouth again.
Daniel felt something painful and affectionate move through him.
Ethan’s sense of scale was improving.
“You don’t have to worry about the people,” Madison said.
“Okay.”
“Your job is to be six.”
“I’m almost seven.”
“Right. Extremely advanced.”
He smiled.
Then his face became serious.
“Are you coming home?”
Madison looked at Daniel.
He gave no help.
“I’m staying with Grandma Evelyn right now.”
“For how long?”
“I don’t know.”
“Are you still my Madison?”
Her face broke then.
She looked away.
Daniel nearly ended the call.
Instead he waited.
Madison wiped her eyes.
“If you want me to be.”
Ethan nodded immediately.
“Okay.”
Afterward, Daniel made macaroni and cheese because neither of them wanted the salmon he had planned.
Ethan complained that Daniel put too much milk in it.
Daniel told him to contact management.
May you like
Ethan said, “You’re management.”
Daniel stared at him.
