Chương 4
Emma nodded.
“I guess that makes sense.”
The sentence carried something underneath it.
Not anger exactly.
Something closer to disappointment.
Jax felt it.
He hated that he felt it.
“You knew where I was?”
Emma pulled out the chair beside Lily.
“I knew where you usually stopped when you traveled this route.”
“You’ve been following me?”
“No.”
She looked at him.
“I knew you.”
That answer landed harder.
Because she was right.
She knew things about him that even people around him now did not.
She knew he hated crowded restaurants.
She knew he never finished the last sip of coffee because it always went cold before he noticed.
She knew he checked his motorcycle twice before every long ride, even if he had checked it ten minutes earlier.
She knew he pretended not to care about things that mattered most.
Jax looked away.
“How long have you known I was around?”
Emma folded her hands on the table.
“About three months.”
“Three months?”
His voice rose slightly before he controlled it.
Lily looked down.
Emma noticed.
Immediately, her expression changed.
“Not here.”
Jax stopped.
That was the first time in years she had told him what to do, and somehow it still sounded the same.
He took a breath.
“You could have called.”
“Yes.”
“You could have found me.”
“Yes.”
“You could have told me.”
Emma looked at him for a long moment.
“I could have.”
The answer made him angry because there was no fight in it.
No excuse.
No attempt to win.
Just an admission.
“Then why didn’t you?”
The question came out sharper than he intended.
A few people in nearby booths glanced over.
Emma noticed.
She lowered her voice.
“Because I did not know if you wanted the truth or if you wanted to feel better about yourself.”
The words hurt because they were not completely unfair.
Jax opened his mouth.
Nothing came out.
Lily stared at the table.
The little girl suddenly looked like she wished she could disappear.
Jax noticed.
He hated that too.
Not Emma.
Not even himself.
The fact that a child had to sit between two adults carrying twenty years of unfinished business.
He softened his voice.
“Lily.”
She looked up.
“You okay?”
She nodded.
“My mom gets quiet when she is nervous.”
Emma looked embarrassed.
“Lily.”
“What?”
“You don’t need to explain me.”
“I’m not.”
The girl shrugged.
“I explain everybody.”
For a moment, nobody spoke.
Then Jax laughed.
It was quiet.
Unexpected.
The sound surprised him as much as everyone else.
Lily smiled.
Emma looked at him.
And for one second, the years between them felt less heavy.
Then the moment passed.
Jax touched the note on the table.
“You wrote this.”
“Yes.”
“Why now?”
Emma looked through the window.
A motorcycle passed on the road outside, its engine fading into the distance.
“I found out I was sick.”
Jax froze.
Emma noticed immediately.
“It is not what you think.”
He stared at her.
“Then what is it?”
“Not cancer.”
She gave a small tired smile.
“Your face has not changed much.”
He ignored the comment.
“What is it?”
“Autoimmune condition.”
“How bad?”
“Some days are fine.”
“And the other days?”
Emma looked down.
“The other days I have to admit I cannot do everything by myself forever.”
The sentence stayed there.
Jax looked at Lily.
The girl was drawing shapes on a napkin with a crayon she had taken from the diner counter.
She looked healthy.
Normal.
Like any other child.
That somehow made everything harder.
“Is that why you brought me into this?”
Emma shook her head.
“No.”
“Then why?”
“Because Lily asked about her father.”
Jax looked at the girl.
She kept drawing.
“She asked?”
“Last year.”
“And you waited?”
“I was trying to figure out what to tell her.”
Emma rubbed her thumb against the edge of her coffee cup.
“She deserved the truth.”
Jax leaned back.
“Did she know my name?”
Emma nodded.
“She knew there was someone named Jax who mattered.”
“That is not the same thing.”
“No.”
Her voice softened.
“It is not.”
The honesty made him uncomfortable.
He would have preferred blame.
Blame was easier.
Blame gave people somewhere to stand.
But Emma was not giving him that.
She was giving him reality.
A waitress walked past and placed a menu near Emma.
“Need anything?”
Emma looked at the menu.
Then at Jax.
“No.”
The waitress walked away.
Jax noticed Emma still looked tired.
Not weak.
Never weak.
But tired in a way that came from carrying too much for too long.
“You should have told me.”
“Yes.”
The answer came immediately.
Again, no defense.
“I should have.”
He looked at her.
“Why are you doing that?”
“Doing what?”
“Agreeing with everything.”
Emma looked confused.
“Because you are right about some things.”
“And the others?”
“I am right about those too.”
Riley quietly coughed into his hand.
Jax looked at him.
“What?”
“Nothing.”
“You are terrible at nothing.”
Riley shrugged.
“Just saying, she still knows how to talk to you.”
Jax almost argued.
Then he realized he had no argument.
Emma had always been the only person who could make him feel like the toughest man alive and the most foolish one at the same time.
Lily finished drawing and pushed the napkin toward him.
Jax looked down.
It was a picture of a motorcycle.
And four stick figures standing beside it.
A woman.
A little girl.
A man.
And another smaller figure.
Jax looked at the fourth figure.
“Who is that?”
Lily looked surprised.
“That is you.”
He looked back at the drawing.
“You drew me smaller.”
“You are sitting down.”
For the first time that day, a real smile reached his face.
Emma saw it.
And the sadness in her eyes became harder to hide.
Because she remembered that smile.
She had spent years wondering if she would ever see it again.
Jax folded the napkin carefully.
May you like
He did not know why he kept doing that.
Maybe because destroying things had always been easier than protecting them.
