Chương 10
Teresa said, “Nobody knows because she is talking about things she does not understand.”
Kayla wiped her face angrily.
“I saw the bank statements.”
My mother froze.
That changed everything.
I heard myself ask, very quietly, “What statements?”
Kayla looked at Teresa.
Then at me.
“The ones in the blue folder.”
Teresa’s voice became almost calm.
“Go to your room.”
Kayla gave a broken laugh.
“I’m twenty-four.”
“Then act like it.”
“I’m trying to.”
She walked to the dining table, pulled out a chair, and reached underneath the seat cushion.
For one strange second, nobody understood what she was doing.
Then she drew out a thin blue folder.
My mother went white.
Kayla held it against her chest.
“I moved it last night.”
Teresa took one step toward her.
“You had no right.”
Kayla backed away.
“You were going to throw it out.”
“I was organizing my papers.”
“You put it in a trash bag.”
Brittany looked between them.
“Jesus Christ.”
I held out my hand.
“Kayla.”
My sister stared at me.
There was apology in her face.
And fear.
And something else.
Relief.
She gave me the folder.
It was lighter than I expected.
I opened it.
The first page was an old bank statement.
The account number matched the one on the trust distribution form.
The opening deposit appeared near the top.
Eighty-five thousand dollars.
Below it were withdrawals.
Transfers.
Checks.
ATM transactions.
Not one catastrophic theft.
Dozens of ordinary ones.
Two thousand here.
Nine hundred there.
Three hundred for something else.
Money leaking away month after month.
I turned the page.
Another statement.
Then another.
One transaction stopped me.
A transfer of twelve thousand dollars.
The recipient line showed a name I recognized.
David Cole.
My father.
For a moment, I thought I had misread the name.
I brought the page closer.
David Cole.
Twelve thousand dollars.
Transferred five years and eight months earlier.
My father had been gone from our lives for more than a decade by then.
“What is this?”
Nobody answered.
I looked at my mother.
“What did you send Dad twelve thousand dollars for?”
Teresa’s face had gone rigid.
“That has nothing to do with you.”
I stared at her.
“It came from money left to me.”
“You don’t know that.”
“The account starts with the trust deposit.”
“It had other money in it.”
“How much?”
She looked away.
“Enough.”
Brittany gave a disgusted little laugh.
“You keep saying that.”
Teresa ignored her.
I turned another page.
There were smaller transfers.
Rent payments.
Department store charges.
A payment to a community college.
Several cash withdrawals.
Then another transfer to David.
Five thousand dollars.
Then three thousand.
My stomach felt hollow.
“He got twenty thousand?”
My mother said nothing.
“Twenty thousand dollars?”
Emily shifted beside me.
Her hand pressed lightly against her belly.
I noticed and stopped.
“You need to sit.”
“I’m okay.”
“Emily.”
“I’m okay.”
Renee pulled a dining chair out anyway.
Emily sat without arguing.
That frightened me more than the argument would have.
Marcus moved closer to her but kept his attention on my mother.
I handed the folder to Brittany.
“Find every payment to Dad.”
Her eyebrows lifted.
“You trust me with it?”
“I trust you to read.”
The comment came out harsher than I meant.
She flinched.
I closed my eyes.
“Sorry.”
“Don’t be.”
She sat at the table and began sorting the statements.
I turned back to Teresa.
“Why was Dad getting money from this account?”
She crossed her arms.
“He needed help.”
I laughed.
The sound was ugly again.
“He needed help?”
“Yes.”
“The man who left you with four kids?”
“He is still your father.”
“You spent twenty years telling us he was garbage.”
“I was angry.”
“You told me he emptied your checking account before he left.”
“He did.”
“You told Brittany he cheated on you.”
“He did.”
“You told Kayla he didn’t even call on birthdays.”
“He didn’t.”
“Then why were you sending him money?”
My mother looked toward the window.
Outside, a CTA bus rolled past the intersection.
Someone honked twice.
Inside the apartment, no one moved.
Teresa finally said, “He was sick.”
The room shifted.
Not dramatically.
Just enough.
“What?”
“He had health problems.”
“What kind?”
“I don’t know.”
“You sent him twenty thousand dollars and you don’t know?”
“He said he needed treatment.”
“When?”
“Around the time your grandfather died.”
My grandfather had hated my father.
That much I knew.
He never said David’s name without making his jaw tight.
Something about the explanation did not fit.
“Why would you use Grandpa’s money to help him?”
My mother’s eyes flashed.
“Because it was available.”
“That’s not a reason.”
“You think people always get to choose clean reasons?”
“No.”
“I had four children asking me for things.”
“We were adults.”
“Not all of you.”
“Lily was nineteen.”
“She was still my child.”
“So was I.”
That landed.
Teresa looked at me.
For one brief second, something in her face cracked.
Then she hardened again.
“I was trying to hold everyone together.”
Emily spoke for the first time.
“By taking from one child without telling him?”
Teresa turned toward her.
“This does not concern you.”
“It concerns me when my husband is working himself sick because money meant for him disappeared.”
“You don’t know what our family went through.”
“No.”
Emily’s voice stayed even.
“But I know what I went through in that kitchen last night.”
Teresa’s mouth tightened.
“You’re really going to compare washing dishes to this?”
“No.”
Emily rested both hands over her stomach.
“I’m saying they came from the same place.”
My mother stared at her.
Emily continued.
“You decide what other people can afford to give you.”
Nobody spoke.
The words were not clever.
They were worse than clever because they were plain.
Teresa shook her head.
“You have no idea what sacrifice looks like.”
Emily’s face changed.
Not anger.
Something more tired.
“I’m not interested in competing with you.”
May you like
That ended the exchange.
Brittany suddenly slapped one statement flat against the table.
