Chương 12
“Why did you sleep with him?”
Vanessa flinched.
Ethan said, “Emily.”
I kept looking at her.
“You don’t have to answer.”
She swallowed.
“I thought he was leaving you.”
The sentence hurt in a new place.
I glanced at Ethan.
He stared at the floor.
“When did he tell you that?”
“December.”
My daughter was conceived in December.
I closed my eyes.
The room disappeared for a second.
“Emily.”
This time it was Daniel.
I inhaled slowly.
The tightness across my abdomen returned.
Stronger.
I waited.
It eased.
“How long had you been involved then?”
Vanessa wiped one cheek.
“Emotionally?”
I opened my eyes.
“Yes.”
“I don’t know.”
“Physically?”
“January.”
Ethan said, “This is not helping anyone.”
“No.”
I looked at him.
“It’s helping me.”
He crossed his arms.
“You want pain, I can give you every ugly detail.”
“That sounds almost threatening.”
“I’m saying none of this changes that we have a child coming.”
“No.”
My voice broke slightly on that word.
I hated it.
I tried again.
“No, it doesn’t.”
For the first time, fear crossed his face that had nothing to do with investors.
“Emily.”
“I am not discussing custody with you today.”
“I didn’t say custody.”
“You were about to.”
“I was going to say we’re still a family.”
Vanessa looked toward the window.
I stared at him.
“I don’t know what we are.”
His eyes reddened.
It startled me.
Ethan rarely cried.
I had seen him cry when his father died and when we lost the first baby.
Nothing else.
“I screwed up.”
He spoke quietly now.
“I screwed up badly.”
I said nothing.
“I can fix the company issues.”
“Maybe.”
“I can terminate the thing with Vanessa.”
Vanessa gave him a look so hollow it made my stomach turn.
“You don’t have to.”
He ignored her.
“I’ll go to therapy.”
I almost laughed, not because therapy was absurd, but because he offered it like an emergency vendor contract.
“I’ll do whatever you want.”
“That’s the problem.”
“What?”
“You’re still waiting for me to give you a list.”
His face tightened.
“I’m trying to save our marriage.”
“I’m trying to understand whether you used my identity to mislead people.”
“I did not steal your identity.”
“Did you sign my name anywhere?”
“No.”
“Did you represent that I held a role I did not hold?”
He hesitated.
“Yes.”
Vanessa looked at him.
Even she seemed surprised he admitted it.
“Did you benefit financially from that representation?”
“It helped the company.”
“You benefited.”
“Yes.”
“Did you create an entity named after my former firm?”
“Yes.”
“Did you control it?”
“Indirectly.”
“Did I know?”
“No.”
“Did you ever intend to tell me?”
He opened his mouth.
Nothing came out.
That answer hurt more than the rest.
I looked down at the paper.
Daniel spoke.
“Emily, you need independent legal counsel before any more discussion about ownership or documents.”
“I know.”
“I can give you names.”
“No one from your firm.”
“Agreed.”
Ethan’s face hardened again.
“You’re really doing this.”
I looked at him.
“What did you expect?”
“I expected us to deal with our marriage privately.”
“Our marriage is private.”
I held up the ledger.
“This isn’t.”
The doorbell rang.
All three of us froze.
Ethan looked toward the entry.
“Are you expecting someone?”
“No.”
Vanessa stood.
“I should go.”
“Wait.”
I did not know why I said it.
Maybe because I no longer trusted what would happen the moment anyone left my sight.
The bell rang again.
Then my phone buzzed with a text from Priya.
Two board members just arrived at your house.
My heart dropped.
I showed the message to no one.
Ethan’s phone began ringing.
He looked at the screen.
His face drained.
“Who is it?”
He did not answer.
I stood carefully.
“Ethan.”
“Board chair.”
The bell rang a third time.
I looked at Vanessa.
She looked terrified.
I looked at Ethan.
For the first time since I had known him, he seemed unable to decide which version of himself to become.
Husband.
CEO.
Accused man.
Father.
He reached for the door.
I caught his arm.
“Before you open that, tell me why the board is here.”
“I don’t know.”
“That’s a lie.”
His eyes met mine.
Outside, someone knocked.
Not politely this time.
Ethan swallowed.
Then he said, “Because Halpern didn’t just find your name.”
My fingers loosened around his arm.
“What else did they find?”
He looked at the envelope in Vanessa’s hand.
Then at me.
“They found payments.”
My stomach tightened hard enough that I bent forward.
This one did not fade.
Daniel’s voice sharpened through the phone.
“Emily?”
I gripped the banister.
Ethan stepped toward me.
“Are you okay?”
I could not answer.
The pain wrapped from my back around my abdomen and held.
Vanessa moved closer.
“Is that a contraction?”
“I don’t know.”
Another knock shook the front door.
My phone buzzed again.
My doctor’s office.
Ethan reached for me.
I pulled away.
“Don’t.”
His hand dropped.
I forced myself upright.
“What payments?”
His eyes flicked toward the door.
“Emily, this is not the time.”
I breathed through the last edge of the pain.
Then I looked at him.
“No.”
My voice came out steadier than I felt.
May you like
“This is exactly the time.”
Ethan looked toward the front door as if the people behind it might disappear if he waited long enough.“They were consulting payments.”“To whom?”“Open the door,” Vanessa said quietly.He ignored her.I pressed one hand against the underside of my stomach and forced myself to stand straight.“To whom, Ethan?”His phone kept ringing in his hand.Finally, he silenced it.“Bennett Strategic Partners.”The words made no sense at first.“You paid the company you created in my name.”“Yes.”“For what?”“Advisory services.”“I never provided advisory services.”“I know.”The front door shook under another knock.Vanessa whispered, “Oh my God.”I looked at Ethan.“How much?”He did not answer.“How much money did you pay yourself using my name?”“It wasn’t myself.”“Then who got it?”“The holding structure.”“How much?”“Over four years?”“Yes.”His eyes moved away.“About one point four.”My mouth went dry.“Million?”“Yes.”The next contraction came before I could respond.It was stronger than the last one.I caught the banister and bent slightly, breathing through my nose.Ethan dropped his phone on the entry table and stepped toward me.“Emily.”“I’m fine.”“You are not fine.”“Don’t tell me what I am.”The pain tightened, held, then slowly released.Vanessa was watching the clock on the wall.I noticed.“What are you doing?”“Timing it.”“Don’t.”“I’m not trying to upset you.”“Then stop looking terrified.”“I’m sorry.”The absurdity of apologizing for looking terrified almost made me laugh.Instead, I straightened.The board members knocked again.Ethan rubbed both hands across his face.“We can’t have this conversation in front of them.”“Why?”“Because they don’t know everything.”I stared at him.“Apparently neither did your wife.”“That isn’t the same.”“It feels remarkably similar from here.”He opened his mouth.I pointed toward the door.“Let them in.”“Emily.”“Either you open it, or I will.”He stood still for another second.Then he opened the door.Martin Hale was not there.Two men stood on the porch.I recognized Robert Chen, Cole Systems’ board chair, from holiday dinners and three company events.Beside him was Thomas Greene, another independent director whose wife had once spent an entire fundraiser explaining sourdough starter to me.Neither man looked as though he had come for a social visit.Robert’s eyes found me first.Then Vanessa.Then Ethan.“May we come in?”Ethan stepped aside without answering.Robert entered, followed by Thomas.Thomas gave me a brief nod.“Emily.”“Tom.”His gaze dropped toward my stomach.“You okay?”“Not especially.”Robert looked at Ethan.“We’ve been trying to reach you.”“I was handling a family matter.”Robert glanced at Vanessa.Something unpleasant passed through the room.“I can see that.”Vanessa looked at the floor.I hated that everyone knew.I hated even more that I cared.Ethan closed the door.“Whatever Halpern told you, we need to handle this through counsel.”“We are,” Robert said.“Then why are you at my house?”“Because you left the office while outside counsel was interviewing your executive assistant.”Ethan’s jaw tightened.“I didn’t authorize that interview.”“You didn’t need to.”“I’m CEO.”“You’re also the subject of the questions.”Silence.Robert’s voice was not loud.That made it worse.Ethan glanced toward me.“Emily shouldn’t be part of this.”Robert’s expression changed.“I’m afraid Emily is already part of it.”I looked at him.“Do you know about Bennett Strategic Partners?”He paused.“Yes.”“For how long?”“Since approximately nine this morning.”“That’s reassuring.”“Emily.”Robert took a breath.“I need to be careful about what I say.”“Because you’re protecting the company?”“Yes.”At least he did not pretend otherwise.“And are you protecting Ethan?”“No.”Ethan laughed bitterly.Robert ignored him.Thomas remained near the door, arms folded, watching everybody.I held up the printed ledger.“Is this real?”Robert did not touch it.“I’ve seen a version of that document.”“Is the equity real?”“Yes.”“Are the payments real?”“As far as we currently know.”Ethan stepped between us.“Stop answering questions without counsel present.”Robert looked at him.“My counsel is present by phone.”He lifted the mobile in his hand.“We’re not here to interrogate anyone.”“Then why are you here?”“To inform you that the special committee has placed you on administrative leave effective immediately.”Nothing moved.Not Ethan.Not Vanessa.Not me.The sentence hung in the room with a strange plainness.Ethan laughed once.“You can’t do that.”“The board can.”“Not without a vote.”“We voted.”“When?”“This morning.”“You convened a vote without me?”“You are not an independent director for purposes of a matter concerning your own conduct.”Ethan’s face reddened.“You don’t even know what happened.”Robert’s expression stayed tired rather than angry.“That is why the leave is administrative.”“You’re destroying the company based on a compliance question.”“No.”Robert’s voice sharpened slightly.“We are trying to prevent that.”Ethan turned toward Thomas.“Tom.”Thomas shook his head.“Don’t.”“You know what this company is without me.”“I know exactly what it is with you.”“That’s not what I mean.”“No, I know.”Thomas looked almost embarrassed.“We all know what you mean.”I had never seen Ethan lose a room so quickly.He usually sensed resistance before anyone else did.He changed tone, changed strategy, made the other person feel smart for agreeing with him.Now he stood in his own entryway with nowhere to reposition.Robert looked at Vanessa.“Ms. Cruz, outside counsel asked you to remain available.”“I know.”“Please do not discuss your interview with Ethan.”Ethan snapped, “She’s standing in my house.”“I didn’t invite her,” I said.Vanessa looked at me.“No.”She held up the envelope slightly.“He did.”Robert’s gaze shifted to Ethan.“What is that?”Nobody answered.I said, “My property.”That was enough.Robert did not ask to see it.Instead, he looked at me.“Please don’t destroy, alter, or transmit anything that may relate to company business.”Daniel’s faint voice came from the phone still in my hand.“Good advice.”Every head turned.I had almost forgotten he was there.Ethan laughed without humor.“Of course Mercer is listening.”Robert’s eyebrows lifted.“Daniel Mercer?”“Yes,” I said.Robert looked at Ethan again.Ethan seemed to interpret the look as accusation.“This is coordinated.”I stared at him.“What?”“You called him last night, Halpern starts digging, the board ambushes me, and now everyone shows up here.”Robert frowned.“Halpern’s review began weeks ago.”Ethan stopped.My own pulse seemed suddenly too loud.“Weeks?”“Yes.”Robert looked at me.“The issue surfaced as part of document reconciliation related to fund restructuring.”“So nobody called Halpern because of me.”“No.”I turned toward Ethan.He had known that.He had lied because he wanted me to believe my call to Daniel had created the crisis.He wanted me guilty.Distracted.Afraid that my anger had endangered hundreds of employees.Something settled inside me.Not rage.Recognition.“You tried to make me think I caused this.”His mouth tightened.“I was trying to get you to come home.”“By lying.”“I needed to talk to you.”“You always need me to be responsible for whatever you’re afraid of.”“That’s not fair.”I almost smiled.“You don’t get to use that phrase anymore.”Thomas looked away.Robert checked his phone.“We should go.”Ethan stepped toward him.“You’re not leaving after dropping this on me.”“I’m not discussing the investigation here.”“You came here.”“To make sure you received notice after you stopped answering.”“My phone was ringing.”“You ignored it.”“I was dealing with my wife.”Robert’s gaze flicked toward me.“No.”His voice was quiet.“You were dealing with yourself.”Ethan went pale.For once, he had no response.Another contraction began.I closed my eyes.This one arrived faster.It gripped low across my stomach, spreading through my back.I heard Vanessa say my name.Then Ethan.Then Daniel through the phone.I raised one hand because I did not want anybody touching me.The pain took longer to release.When I opened my eyes, Thomas was checking his watch.“How long since the last one?”I stared at him.“My wife had four kids.”“That qualifies you for absolutely nothing.”He almost smiled.“Fair.”Vanessa looked at the wall clock.“About six minutes.”My stomach dropped.“No.”Ethan stepped closer.“We’re going to the hospital.”“I’m eight months.”“Exactly.”“I mean it’s too early.”Robert said, “Emily, you should call your doctor.”“My doctor has been calling me.”Five people stared at me.I sighed.“Apparently I’m the irresponsible one now.”That actually made Thomas laugh.A tiny startled sound.The room loosened for half a second.Then my phone began ringing again.My obstetrician.I answered.“Hi, Dr. Patel.”Her voice was brisk.“Emily, I’ve been trying to reach you because your lab results came back from yesterday.”I frowned.“What lab results?”“The blood pressure panel we ran after your home readings were elevated.”I had forgotten completely about the blood draw.“Is something wrong?”“Your protein level is higher than I want, and your liver enzymes are slightly elevated.”Everyone in the room watched my face.Dr. Patel continued.“Are you having any symptoms right now?”I looked at Ethan.Then at Vanessa.Then at the two board members who had arrived to remove my husband from the company he believed was his alone.“Define symptoms.”“Headache, visual changes, upper abdominal pain, contractions, unusual swelling.”“I’m having contractions.”Her voice changed immediately.“How frequent?”I looked at Vanessa.“Six minutes?”Vanessa nodded.“About six minutes.”“How long has that been happening?”“I don’t know.”“Emily.”“Maybe an hour.”Ethan closed his eyes.Dr. Patel said, “I want you in labor and delivery now.”My chest tightened.“Now?”“Yes.”“Could this just be Braxton Hicks?”“Maybe.”That one word frightened me because she did not soften it.“But with your labs and gestational age, I don’t want you evaluating that at home.”“Okay.”“Do not drive yourself.”“I won’t.”“Are you alone?”I looked around the room.“No.”That answer carried its own strange comedy.“Good.”She gave me instructions for the hospital and ended the call.Ethan grabbed his keys from the entry table.“I’ll take you.”“No.”His hand froze.“Emily.”“Not you.”Something broke visibly in his face.“We’re having a baby.”“Maybe.”“Then I’m coming.”“I didn’t say you couldn’t come.”I picked up my purse.“I said you’re not driving me.”Robert stepped back toward the door.“We’ll leave.”Thomas nodded.“If you need anything practical, call.”Ethan looked at them in disbelief.“You suspend me, then offer my wife help?”Thomas’s expression hardened.“This moment is not about you.”Ethan flinched as if he had been slapped.Vanessa stood holding the gray envelope.“I can drive.”I stared at her.The suggestion was so absurd that for a second none of us reacted.Then I laughed.I actually laughed.Vanessa started laughing too, one hand covering her mouth.It was horrible and inappropriate and exactly what my body apparently needed.Even Robert smiled despite himself.Ethan did not.I wiped my eyes.“No offense.”“None taken.”“I think arriving at labor and delivery with my husband’s mistress would complicate the intake forms.”Her smile vanished into embarrassment.“Right.”“I’ll call Daniel.”Ethan’s face hardened.“No.”I looked at him.“You don’t get to decide that.”“I’m your husband.”“For the moment.”The words escaped before I considered them.He went completely still.I wished I could take them back.Not because they were false.Because cruelty had begun to feel too easy.I lowered my voice.“You can follow us.”His eyes reddened again.“Follow you.”“Yes.”He nodded once.It looked painful.Robert and Thomas left first.Vanessa held out the envelope.I took it carefully.“Keep the key,” I said.She frowned.“Why?”“Because I don’t want anything else entering or leaving that cabinet until someone independent deals with it.”She closed her fingers around the brass key.“You trust me with it?”“No.”Her face fell slightly.“I trust that everyone now knows you have it.”A strange little smile touched her mouth.“Fair.”I called Daniel.He answered immediately.“I heard.”“Can you drive me?”“I’m already leaving.”I ended the call.Ethan stared at the phone.“You’d rather have him take you to the hospital than me.”I put one hand against my aching back.“At this particular moment, yes.”His mouth opened.I raised a hand.“I cannot manage your feelings right now.”That silenced him.Vanessa picked up her purse.“I should go.”I looked at her.“Outside counsel will probably want that key.”“I’ll give it directly to them.”“Good.”She hesitated at the door.“Emily.”“What?”“I am sorry.”Ethan turned away.I studied her face.I wanted to hate her cleanly.It would have been convenient.She had slept with my husband.She had entered my house.She had taken my property.She had helped erase my name from records.All of that remained true.But she was also standing there pale and frightened, discovering that the man who promised to protect her had apparently planned to make her the easiest person to blame.“I believe you’re sorry.”Her eyes filled.I continued.“That isn’t the same as forgiveness.”“I know.”“Good.”She left.Ethan and I stood alone in the entryway.For the first time since yesterday afternoon, there was no employee, lover, board member, old friend, or ringing phone between us.He looked suddenly older.“I never meant to take anything from you.”I held the envelope against my chest.“You took the part where I got to choose.”His throat moved.“I thought I was protecting what we were building.”“You mean what you were building.”He looked down.This time he did not correct me.A car pulled into the driveway.Daniel.Ethan heard it too.“I hate him.”“I know.”“I always have.”“I’m beginning to notice.”That almost drew a smile from him.Almost.Another contraction started.I grabbed the edge of the entry table.Ethan moved instinctively.This time I let him steady my elbow.Neither of us spoke until the pain eased.His hand remained there for one second longer than necessary.Then he released me.“I’ll be right behind you.”I nodded.He picked up his keys.At the door, I looked back at the house.The nursery upstairs was unfinished.The bassinet still had its price tag attached.Three tiny onesies were folded on the chair because I had never put them away.Yesterday morning, I had believed the most frightening thing ahead of me was childbirth.Now I stepped outside carrying evidence of a company created in my name, while the father of my child followed several feet behind me like someone who no longer knew whether he was family or a witness.Daniel got out of his car.His eyes went from me to Ethan and then to the envelope.He did not ask.“Hospital?”“Yes.”He opened the passenger door.Ethan stopped beside his own car.“Emily.”I turned.For a moment, he looked exactly like the twenty-nine-year-old man who once stood beside a broken office printer and promised me he would someday build something worth all the risk.“I’m sorry,” he said.No defense followed.No explanation.Just the words.I wished he had said them yesterday.I wished he had said them five years ago.I wished they were enough now.Another tightening began deep in my back.I lowered myself carefully into Daniel’s car.“Drive.”
